A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

Thank you

  • Tinny
  • Tinny's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
17 Oct 07 #4820 by Tinny
Topic started by Tinny
Just a quick post to say thanks to those of you who posted replies to me over the pasy few days. I was feeling very low but yesterday went home feeling more in control again. I need to take control back and although I blame Ex for a lot I need to take responsibilty too because I let him take control. They are not "his" kids, they are "ours" and he needs to remember that.

Fingers crossed I can keep this up but Im not going to promise that I wont be back moaning again. ;)


  • Sera
  • Sera's Avatar
  • User is blocked
  • User is blocked
17 Oct 07 #4822 by Sera
Reply from Sera

No probs! If you can't moan here, then where can you moan!!

We all have our days, and as the chat room shows, we're all pretty much in the same boat, in un-chartered waters, and we support and learn from each other.

I just want to share this with you:
Just stay strong for your kids. They will not forget who their mother is, even if you are not the parent with the residence. They are yours for life. Be there for them, and when you aren't physically in their company, just re-assure them you're at the end of the phone if you need them.

They will adjust to not losing a parent in divorce. Your ex might be hostile now, but if you can attend their functions; school Parents evening etc; and show a united front, all the better for them and their well-being.

When you take back your power, and make positive posts like 'they are our kids', you will be better able to cope.
Well done!

(You could say it another way: "Don't let the Bast*rds get to you"!)


  • mike62
  • mike62's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
17 Oct 07 #4827 by mike62
Reply from mike62
Tinny, you are most welcome - the people I have met on here are wonderful, because they care. If you ever feel low, someone will make you smile, or show you a different angle on something, or even just take your mind off it. Seeing other people's lives and their personal issues often helps you to put your issues into perspective. And it's nice to have a shoulder to cry on when you need it.

For me, come moan whenever you need to. ;)


  • apm
  • apm's Avatar
  • Senior Member
  • Senior Member
17 Oct 07 #4829 by apm
Reply from apm

Moaning is what this place exists for!! :laugh:

  • sexysadie
  • sexysadie's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
17 Oct 07 #4853 by sexysadie
Reply from sexysadie
I agree with everything that has been said here.

I wanted particularly to echo what Sera said about going to parents' evenings, etc. You don't have to show a united front if your ex won't play that game; you can go on your own if necessary. Most schools are very supportive about both parents being involved with their children's education, and most primary schools will make separate parents' evening appointments for each of you. You should be able to get them to supply your children with two copies of letters home, newsletters, etc. If the children don't want or can't be bothered to pass them on (I only get the ones from mine because I go through their bags regularly) then leave a pile of stamped addressed envelopes with the school office.


Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11

The modern, convenient and affordable way to divorce.

No-Fault Divorce £179

We provide the UK's lowest cost no-fault divorce service, managed by a well respected firm of solicitors. 

Online Mediation £250

Online mediation is a convenient and inexpensive way to agree on a fair financial settlement.

Consent Order £259

This legally binding agreement defines how assets (e.g. properties and pensions) are to be divided.

Court Support £250

Support for people who have to go to court to get a fair divorce financial settlement without a solicitor.