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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

How do I keep going?

  • Camelia
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08 Nov 07 #6181 by Camelia
Reply from Camelia
God what a nightmare for you, he sounds like my ex, a complete control freak, everything done on his terms, when he wants or when he feels like it.

Having only been two weeks into a separation, he has moved out to live with an aunt who is a widow, I too am finding it stressful but for different reasons. I am sure that people who say it gets better know that through experience, and you have to hang on to that and in the end, life will get better.


  • terrified
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08 Nov 07 #6183 by terrified
Reply from terrified
I spent 6 months like that with ex no. 1 after I had bought a house bur was advised not to leave marital home if I wanted custody of my two daughters. I survived by moving myself in to sleep with the girls. Our beautiful, now departed but much missed, cat Licky used to come to comfort us in bed as well. I left that marriage after 13 years with nothing except a set of saucepans and a desk, but also with my beautiful daughters who made it clear to Court Welfare that they wished to be with me despite moving away from school friends and despite ex trying to claim I was insane. I regret nothing. Now I am faced with losing everything to ex no. 2, whom I married when in financial and emotional despair at coping on my own. Ah well, it's only money in the end. Self-respect and love from kids and cats mean so much more!

  • when will it end
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09 Nov 07 #6207 by when will it end
Reply from when will it end
Today I feel stronger, not sure how long it will last but it beats feeling low. I am tired of the arguing, best way to explain in ground hog day every day for the last 8 months.

I shall enjoy the stregth for as long as it lasts

  • Autumn
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09 Nov 07 #6211 by Autumn
Reply from Autumn
Glad that today is a better one for you, you will find as time passes that the up days start to outweigh the down ones.

Go do something just for you today, keep smiling


  • studland
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20 Jan 08 #11263 by studland
Reply from studland
When times are hard, remember
Hope your days are better.

  • topaz
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20 Jan 08 #11271 by topaz
Reply from topaz
I find being in same house as x, whilst waiting to resolve finances like being in limbo.just existing ,waiting and not being able to do anything because I dont know where I'll be in the future so I can't plan anything.
jobs around the MH left undone because I dont know whether there's any point because I might have to leave it.
When I do anything like tidy up or cleaning..x messes it up.Find myself spending more time on my own just to avoid him.
How doI keep going? the answer is knowing that it will end at some point and x will be out of my life forever!!

  • attilladahun
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20 Jan 08 #11283 by attilladahun
Reply from attilladahun
Where are you up to in the Divorce process?

Proceedings issued?
Financial application issued?

Any chance of basic details
Ages of H & W
Inc of H & W
Capital of H & W
FMH value -mortgage =equity
Is FMH (Former matrimonial home) in Joint Names
How old is your son?
Is your H the father?
Length of Marriage
Length you and H lived together before marriage

Often getting down to the real financial issues and suggesting a "fix" can
open "doors" when dealing with "control artistes" or "those who put head in the sand".

Things can seem bad and may be BUT with the elp and support from all lets get you from A-Z as quick as poss and cheaply

If H behaves inappropriately it sometimes helps to give him a legal reality check

Do you know his finances or is he secretive?

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