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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?
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weird behaviour of x2b since decree nisi granted.
12 Nov 07 #6433 by Onelife
Reply from Onelife
Hi Topaz
I have exactly the same thing going on...
mine sends me emails wishing he could turn back time, sends texts saying "there's a single man at the end of drive for you" and invites me round for a glass of wine. When I declined, he kept saying "go on - just one"... He invited me for Sunday roast the last weekend he had the children, and again I declined saying I couldnt make it, but then he offered to delay the meal so I could make it, so I went, I didnt feel I could keep refusing. We were supposed to be sitting down to discuss our finances last tuesday, but instead he wanted me to go to his to listen to our records that he'd been sorting from the 80's, when we met. Odd isnt the word. Needless to say - I declined, politely. He still came here for the meeting, but laid into me verbally within seconds of sitting down, even when I sat before him falling apart/crying, he carried on. Hugely confusing after all that "niceness". He sent a text apologising for his behaviour after the event, but couldnt explain why he treated me like that.
Some people reading your thread might think "he's making an effort to get along, move your relationship on to a new level" - My experience would advise you to be cautious. I dont want to tarnish your extb with the same brush as mine, but my extb does like to "lure" me into a false place of friendship, even hinting he's made a mistake and tests the waters of reconcilliation, which makes me try to build a new level of trust, and then wallop - he hits me with some new, appalling piece of behaviour and I'm left feeling very foolish all over again. I've now decided I cannot be friends with this man - he's made it impossible. I am polite, fair and business like now.
If you and your ex are still communicating honestly, maybe he is reaching out in his own way to try and see if the relationship can be salvaged? Sometimes the nisi can evoke feelings "of what the hell are we doing".
I dont know about you, but I am exhausted with mind games - I would just prefer if they have something to say - say it honestly, rather than leave us questioning their motives, and toying with our emotions.
Have you asked him why he has changed his behaviour towards you?
I have exactly the same thing going on...
mine sends me emails wishing he could turn back time, sends texts saying "there's a single man at the end of drive for you" and invites me round for a glass of wine. When I declined, he kept saying "go on - just one"... He invited me for Sunday roast the last weekend he had the children, and again I declined saying I couldnt make it, but then he offered to delay the meal so I could make it, so I went, I didnt feel I could keep refusing. We were supposed to be sitting down to discuss our finances last tuesday, but instead he wanted me to go to his to listen to our records that he'd been sorting from the 80's, when we met. Odd isnt the word. Needless to say - I declined, politely. He still came here for the meeting, but laid into me verbally within seconds of sitting down, even when I sat before him falling apart/crying, he carried on. Hugely confusing after all that "niceness". He sent a text apologising for his behaviour after the event, but couldnt explain why he treated me like that.
Some people reading your thread might think "he's making an effort to get along, move your relationship on to a new level" - My experience would advise you to be cautious. I dont want to tarnish your extb with the same brush as mine, but my extb does like to "lure" me into a false place of friendship, even hinting he's made a mistake and tests the waters of reconcilliation, which makes me try to build a new level of trust, and then wallop - he hits me with some new, appalling piece of behaviour and I'm left feeling very foolish all over again. I've now decided I cannot be friends with this man - he's made it impossible. I am polite, fair and business like now.
If you and your ex are still communicating honestly, maybe he is reaching out in his own way to try and see if the relationship can be salvaged? Sometimes the nisi can evoke feelings "of what the hell are we doing".
I dont know about you, but I am exhausted with mind games - I would just prefer if they have something to say - say it honestly, rather than leave us questioning their motives, and toying with our emotions.
Have you asked him why he has changed his behaviour towards you?
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