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Christmas Shopping Woman

  • TMax
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04 Dec 07 #8408 by TMax
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Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules and you should have no problems.

1. When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. As a man, you can never have too many cordless drills. No one knows why.:)

2. If you cannot afford a cordless drill, buy him anything with the word socket and wrench in it. Men love saying those words. "Hey Jim, can I borrow your socket wrench?" "OK. Bye-the-way, are you through with my 3/8-inch socket yet?" Again, no one knows why.:)

3. If you are really, really broke, buy him anything for his car. A £0.99 ice scraper, a small bottle of de-icer or something to hang from his rear view mirror. Men love gifts for their cars. No one knows why.:)

4: Do not buy men socks. Do not buy men ties. And never buy men bathrobes. If God had wanted men to wear bathrobes, he wouldn't have invented boxer shorts.:woohoo:

5: You can buy men new remote controls to replace the ones they have worn out. If you have a lot of money buy your man a big-screen TV with the little picture in the corner. Watch him go wild as he flips, and flips, and flips.:woohoo:

6. Do not buy a man any of those fancy liqueurs. If you do, it will sit in a cupboard for 23 years. Real men drink whiskey or beer.:blink:

7. Do not buy any man industrial-sized canisters of after shave or deodorant. We do not stink - We are earthy.:angry:

8. Buy men label makers. Almost as good as cordless drills. Within a couple of weeks there will be labels absolutely everywhere. "Socks. Shorts. Cups. Saucers. Door. Lock. Sink." You get the idea. No one knows why.:)

9. Never buy a man anything that says "some assembly required" on the box. It will ruin his Special Day and he will always have parts left over.:dry:

10. Good places to shop for men include Iron Works, B & Q, Home Base, focus, DIY Clearance Centres. It doesn't matter if he doesn't know what it is. A Auto, Must be something I need. Hey! Isn't this a starter for a '63 Ford Zephyr? Wow! Thanks.")

11. Men enjoy danger. That's why they never cook - but they will barbecue. Get him a monster barbecue with a 100-pound propane tank. Tell him the gas line leaks. "Oh the thrill! The challenge! Who wants a hamburger?":woohoo:

12. Tickets to a Man U/Lions/Liver pool/Arsenal games are a smart gift. However, he will not appreciate tickets to "A Retrospective of 19th Century Quilts." Everyone knows why.:laugh:

13 Men love chain saws. Never, ever, buy a man you love a chain saw. If you don't know why - please refer to Rule 8 and what happens when he gets a label maker.:)

14 It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminum extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It must be an extension ladder. No one knows why.:lol:

15 Rope. Men love rope. It takes us back to our cave man ape origins, or at least The Boy Scouts. Nothing says love like a hundred feet of 3/8" manila rope.( make sure you get rid of that 4 poster bed)No one knows why.:silly:

  • Angel557
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04 Dec 07 #8419 by Angel557
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Thats my dad's prezzie sorted .A cordless drill ;)

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04 Dec 07 #8423 by Camberwick green
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DVD’s and cufflinks I have bought my Man.
I am not even going to go down the road of DIY as I am probably better than him and I have seen the mess most men can make when they think they ‘can’ LOL

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04 Dec 07 #8424 by Angel557
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Well CG if he don't like em , you should of taken advice from the list above.Surely even your garden could do with another wheelbarrow ?

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05 Dec 07 #8480 by Pickle
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You forgot about the gadgets!!

Can't go wrong with a new iPod ...lol :-D (already got it so I can post this :D)

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09 Dec 07 #8708 by escapy
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wow very helpful, you should write a book. am off to b & q. xxx

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09 Dec 07 #8716 by Shelia
Reply from Shelia
How about a sonic screw driver like Dr Who has?

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