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changing the locks

  • Jacko
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15 Dec 07 #9080 by Jacko
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I work in the midlands and had been returning to the FMH in Devon at the weekends to see the children and gradually tidy things up with a view to moving out permanently.

My wife has had the locks changed allegedly because a former partner from a brief affair who badly beat her and another woman has just finished a 12 month prison sentence for these assults.

I suspect the reason has more to do with the fact she is now involved with some one else and now has him living in the house. From what the neighbors say he doesn't sound much better than the last bloke.

If the situation were reversed I don't think I would want my X2B being able to swan in unannounced whenever they felt like it.

I have made no attempt to get back into the house now I've got my personal belongings out. Though I did take exception to the garage locks being changed which I built and was storing my things in. I had specifically written to her sol saying that I was storing my things in my garage and asked that she didn't keep breaking in as I had nowhere else to store things. I am now paying to store my things.

I cut the locks off the garage so I could get my stuff out I've written to her sol and told them and left it at that there seems little point in trying to take it any further.

You go ahead and get the locksmith in if he does start kicking of what can he do really? you call the police if it starts getting nasty I don't think they will be asking you to leave! LOL

I'm on the receiving end of this so know what it feels like if your H has any sense as long has he's got his personal things and you will allow him pre arranged entry should he need to get in there is no point in complaining. There are going to be plenty of other things that need worrying about!

I am the respondent.

  • loobyloo
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15 Dec 07 #9082 by loobyloo
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change them locks, its legal. My x2b changed locks with still kids stuff in house. If i break into my OWN house can be done for criminal damage laughable but in your case acceptable...... change em girl!!!

  • attilladahun
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15 Dec 07 #9094 by attilladahun
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You cannot be done for crimial damage to your own property Loobyloo honest!

  • tarot
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15 Dec 07 #9101 by tarot
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My x2b and I used to own the marital home together. He moved out. I spoke to my solicitor about changing the locks and was told
that if i changed the locks then legally he has a right to gain access (as the house is half his) but any damage must be paid for by him.
To be fair, the house is legally mine now and i still havent changed them although it irritates me when he comes to collect the kids and just walks straight in :angry:

Changing the locks is just one of those jobs i havent got round too

  • sexysadie
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15 Dec 07 #9102 by sexysadie
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To be fair, he realised some time ago that neither I nor the children liked him walking straight in and stopped doing it. But the possibility that he could, thinking we are out, worries me, now that I have found that he is doing that. If I had known how unproblematic it would be I would have done it months ago.


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15 Dec 07 #9105 by IKNOWNOW
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Legally if the house is jointly owned you are not allowed to change the locks. That said, I have changed the locks with acceptance from both the police and my solicitor. My solicitor advised my x2b that it was my intention to change the locks. It should not have made a difference as he has given his assurance by way of a solicitor's letter that he will not enter the FMH.
Sadly, on Tuesday he did attempt to enter the property and all hell broke lose, resulting in me having to lock myself and my 1 & 2 year old girls in the car. The police were then called.
He once again got away with the intimidation and abuse and was informed by the police that he was in fact legally allowed to force entry to the property. Although he was told that if I or my children were in the property then it would constitute and offence and he could be arrested.
It is a hard one, but i feel it was justified in me changing the locks owing to the abuse i suffered and am still suffering at the hands of my x2b. My x2b used to come into the property when i was out and phone me to tell me he was in the house and going through my things. How can I be expected to take personal paperwork with me every time I go out?
My advise would be to discuss it with your solicitor and get them to advise x2b of your intentions to change the locks.
You need to be able to feel safe and at peace in your own home.
I cannot walk into his new home, where he and his new woman live so why should he be able to walk in on my life any more. It is a control thing and he doesn't like the fact that I am controlling his actions to some extent.
As for collecting his belongings, well; he has bought all new clothes, he took his beer glasses and golfing trophies - shame he left his photos of his 5 adorable children.
You have to do what is right for you. As long as you can justify your actions then it is unlikely that a judge would take a different view.

  • lovey
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15 Dec 07 #9107 by lovey
Reply from lovey
Hi Sadie,

i did change the locks and told my solictor however if he wanted anything out of the house he should give me 24 hours notice and he can come in and take what he needs, i actually told him i got locked out( my key broke) and had to get a locksmith out,he alledgley went to the police station and reported me i have not heard anything from the police at all i doubt he went. I did keep my solictor informed and do keep records, if he is violent then you have that on your side, also fYI our local council South Bucks do not rehouse violent husbands! hope you are ok things are tough i know where is the light at the end of thte tunnel. lovey

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