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Looking forward [with trepadation]

  • seamus
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01 Jan 08 #9766 by seamus
Topic started by seamus
Happy New Year all.
Yesterday my husband asked for my wedding ring back and left[only to return in the small hours blind drunk]
This is the last in a long chain of events and I have to divorce him now.
I will see a solicitor very soon,my husband refuses to leave the house as his name is on the deeds.The house was mine untill 2 years ago when we married,my 2 children live with me and have been brought up in this house it is their home. My husband paid off the mortgage and made improvements so to pay him back in full I will return the 88k. I do not want anything else from him or the marraige [cars,boats,money from his business that I have worked for unpaid since we married]. Unfortunatly this is not enough for him. He wants to yell shout swear push throw things and generally tantrum his way through this divorce over every tiny everyday thing. I have bought earplugs and my children hide under the table when he starts. He already has one charge under breach of the peace when there were witnesses. I can see this being a very long few months or however long it takes.I do not rise to the bait but I find it very stressful. How does a non molestation order work/ yesterday he threw a wet towel at me and pushed me, tomorrow he might do worse.
Thanks for listening and Happy New Year to all of you

  • gone1
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01 Jan 08 #9768 by gone1
Reply from gone1
Hi seamus. Did you get a penal attachment to your non mol order? U have to go back to court and have witnesses that he has broken the non mol order. Bad but thats the law (I think) hopefully someone will know for sure.

Just keep calm. I know its hard but you must do this. He is all pi** and wind. My ex was like that. She was like a cyclone at times. I ended up on the floor a couple of times and you realy do see stars! :)

I never thought of earplugs but I did have my ipod and that worked wonders. Mind you that set her off as well.

If you can keep calm while he is losing his head it will be better for you and the kids. He sounds a right idiot. But we are not all blessed with brains and the good news is all blokes are not the same. Happy new year. Chris

  • seamus
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01 Jan 08 #9770 by seamus
Reply from seamus
Thanks Chris,
I dont have a non molestation order. I just wondered how they work. Do you have to go to court to get one ? Im sure there is somewhere on this site I can read all about it. Thanks for all that

  • Specialdad
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01 Jan 08 #9775 by Specialdad
Reply from Specialdad
You have to get a non molestation order and an occupation order.

The first will stop him verbally and physically abusing you unless he wants to go to jail.

The occupation order will order him out of the home if he does not leave voluntarily.

  • sexysadie
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01 Jan 08 #9785 by sexysadie
Reply from sexysadie
I agree with Chris and SpecialDad. You have to get him out of the house as soon as possible as his abuse is likely to get worse. It is damaging for the children to see you being shouted at, pushed and hit, so you need to take action for their sakes as well as your own.

Women's Aid can probably help you with a non-molestation order but it is probably quickest to go to a solicitor. You want one who specialises in family law. The Law Society can give you a list of those in your area who do this.


  • Shelia
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01 Jan 08 #9798 by Shelia
Reply from Shelia
Why don't you call the police? The Domesic Violence Unit is very good. They like to prevent violence escalating and will give you some advice and it will reassure you should you need to call them in am emergency.

Best wishes


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