This week seems to be very stressful.I am trying to work out my housing options should we sell.Neighbour knocked on the door tonight and told me I have a squirrels nest in my roofas well as a hole in it.Seemed like the final straw.Told s2bx and he was so just not interested.Have had days of feeling like I just can't be bothered to do things around the house, but eventually force myself.I have trouble sleeping(getting to and staying asleep).Usually go to sleep crying and wake up like it too. Realised today it has been 7 months, since he left, feel like I have moved on in a lot of ways but the depression and stress really gets to me at times.Plus being diabetic it means my blood sugar goes way out of control when I am like this. I keep telling myself once I am out of mh I will start to feel better, its just this house, the memories and the stress of splitting that is pulling me down.Some days I feel so lonely and wonder if I will ever meet someone I will want to trust again.Wish I could take medication to help with the depression but it slows my heart down so much(I have heart disease)so Id rather suffer the tears than have the final option.
Firstly I would talk to your GP about ways you can deal with your depression. It is not a good thing to have at the best of times but with diabetes and heart disease you need to look after yourself and being depressed does not help you do this. Maybe there are other anti-depressants or similar that can be prescribed, or maybe they could refer you for counselling.
So have you decided to sell the house or is that just one option? Do you want to stay there, it doesn't sound like it!
If neither of you wants to stay in the house, you could agree to put it on the market whilst the divorce is proceeding and if it does sell prior to any financial settlement the proceeds just get held in an account by your solicitor until it is decided who gets what.
I know that if you need to you can claim housing benefit if entitled for a period of 6 months I think whilst you are waiting for settlement, although if you have more than £6000 in savings you would not be entitled.
Obviously not sure of your situation but maybe ways around things.
You do seem to need to talk to someone about the way all this is making you feel though.
thanks for the marbles!
I am thinking of selling the house, but can't unless he agrees to, and also I am concerned that if it doesn't sell right away that I will have to pay twice for the HIP pack.
I am going to make an appointment with my GP,I think there is a waiting list for councelling.I think pills are out of the question and I am a bit worried to take some as before when i had them I got hooked.I have been to the housing office today and got some forms to fill in.. I also had another talk with s2bx which has depressed me even more.He made me feel like I should have seen the invisible signs that he was unhappy ,so I am doing that blame thing again.. every time I seem to think I have made a move forward I get myself dragged back.He seemed to be saying he would sign the house over to me, but he has said things before and gone back on them.I just think he is confused and messed up,and really feel I shouldn't be concernered with how he feels, it is time to start thinking of number one now.
Townie - Counselling helped me enormously, I would really recommend you press your GP to refer you.
I have to add though, the first couple of sessions I would feel awful the day after as the Counselling session had brought to the forefront of my mind those things I was trying to block out.
I was provided with 6 sessions by my GP (plus one as an initial introduction to my Counsellor). Once I got over the hurdle of dealing with the emotions I was trying to block out it was much easier to deal with things and I got my life back on track, and more importantly started to consider ME rather than my X2B and what I wanted, not what HE wanted.
I still get my bad days but now I am able to work through them after seeking counselling.
I hope it all gets sorted for you.
I am going to make an appointment to see my doctor tomorrow.
I have had councelling before(I was diagnosed with post traumatic stress)didn't think it helped much,but maybe it will this time around.
i suppose is made worse I think by the fact i have quite a serious heart condition,so any stress I really struggle to cope with.I have my bad days and good days and not many inbetween days.I suppose I need to talk things out and not let it all get to me so much.t certainly feels like life is a rollercoaster.My problem is dealing with the feeling that I am never going to trust anyone again,and feeling so alone.
I know exactly how you feel. I think I am coping well and then he says something or I get a letter from the solicitor and then I am back to square one.
I find it difficult that the person I thought i knew so well has turned into such an uncaring person where me and the kids are concerned. What probably hurts most is the fact he keeps lying and then tries to put the blame on me.
I have always thought he is going through a mid life crisis but the way he acts makes me start to doubt myself instead. I am lucky that I have good friends who put up with my moaning and that I have found this site.
At least we know we are not alone.
Perhaps in time we will be able to trust again, but in the meantime we must never give up.