Any way after all of this and despite me telling him i still want to work it out, He will not come home. He is now telling me I am controlling and that I have controlled his life and that is why he left. Hes never been a family man and to be honest I feel like i have been starved of affection for so long. He has jetskis, a boat, motorbikes and wants to go off and do his own thing which I think would have been fine if the time he spent with his family was quality time. So I will admit that I pulled a face when he went off, That when he arrived home 2 hrs after he said he would i wasnt happy. Is that controlling? Finally, today I have told him that i cannot live like this anymore and I want a divorce. But im so scared of the future and of moving on. Please help
hi,it is fear of the unknown,I am sure you did not come to this decision very lighty.once you have made up your mind i think it is better to get on with it,if u do not now you will still end up doing one day and just wished u had done sooner,it takes to to make a marriage work so you cannot do it on your on.Once the trust has gone it is impossible to get back to normal.itis not going to be easy,there are going to be some terrible days but they do get better,you can always find a ready ear for your trouble here.Most of all you need to look after yourself well so that youcan face all the problems u will encounter.
Quite honestly he doesn't sound like the marrying type. Obviously you love him, but your're probably in love with the 'potential' of what you dream he could be, rather than the reality of what he is.
Him citing you a control freak is typical of a guy that wants a jet-skiing batchelor lifestyle.
You now need to concentrate on you, the family, what you want for your life. Accepting he's never really given you affection is honest. The future is unsure, (for most of us here) but one things for sure, you'll have new opportunities.
If he's never been what you wanted, well done in recognising this. The chances are - he never will be. It sounds like you're quite used to being a single mum, with an elusive husband.