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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

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  • Hacked Off
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10 May 12 #329778 by Hacked Off
Reply from Hacked Off
John, you will have ''better'' days, ''bad'' days, ''reasonable'' days - all sorts of days.
It''s part of the moving forward process. Just dont beat yourself up if you''re having a ''crap'' day because you might feel a whole lot better the next day.
Pleased you have stuck to the no contact rule. Each day you can do that is an achievement by itself.
You are still in shock but gradually you will come to accept the situation and move forward. Takes time, sometimes a lot of time - but you''ll get there in the end. Honest.
All the comments on here are from people who''ve been through the mill themselves.
You should be thankful you never married her or had children.

  • johnt153
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10 May 12 #329818 by johnt153
Reply from johnt153
Thank you all.

I cannot possibly allow myself to be under her control or power any longer - I MUST take care of me. I do miss the person I thought I knew dreadfully because we were so good together - or so I was led to believe. BUT she''s decided all that meant for nothing and went off with someone else. The pain is unbelievable. But she''s treat me appallingly and somebody like that cannot be worth my love and friendship. Her loss, right?


  • yellowrose
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10 May 12 #329822 by yellowrose
Reply from yellowrose
Her loss, right?

Absolutely her loss. It''s just hard to keep that in mind sometimes.

YR xxxxxxx

  • Marshy_
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10 May 12 #329836 by Marshy_
Reply from Marshy_
johnt153 wrote:

Her loss, right?

Yes. But not right now. At the mo she is all loved up. But in time, she will realise what she has lost. Get with your mistress and you always leave a vacancy. C.

  • samchik1
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12 May 12 #330172 by samchik1
Reply from samchik1

I know exactly how you''re feeling. I''m sitting here eating dinner with my son. We cooked a meal together (well...he''s 3...but he helped:-), now we are eating it round the table. We played today. We went to the forest for a walk. We went to the park. We did the shopping. We watched a DVD together.

But my wife''s absence is impossible to ignore. She was a huge part of our family and there''s a gaping hole where I wish she was. I wish she was round the table with us now. In the park I see families...with their children...but I am not like them.

The pain you mention is my pain too. I have no magic bullet for you. Seems that we simply have to pass through this any which way we can.

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