A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

In the wee hours

  • johnt153
  • johnt153's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
12 May 12 #330093 by johnt153
Topic started by johnt153
- Is when I miss her most. I roll over in bed and automatically try to put my arm around her to keep her loved and safe...and she''s not there. I don''t like her as a person but my heart misses her smile and cuddling in :(John.

  • leftwondering
  • leftwondering's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
12 May 12 #330094 by leftwondering
Reply from leftwondering
Hi John

Practically everyone on this forum knows exactly what you are feeling.
Being physically close to your partner in bed is part of the bonding process and makes us feel safe. A bit like a security blanket.
It makes us feel that regardless of the stress the day has brought, everything is all right with the world.
This is a natural human thing.
Before all this happened, I had never slept alone for more than 30 years.
It takes a lot of adjustment.


  • flowerofscotland
  • flowerofscotland's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
12 May 12 #330095 by flowerofscotland
Reply from flowerofscotland
Hi johnt153,

You will eventually, with time, slip into a new routine, it is just a difficult adjustment to make after so long together. Take care for now as it always is the wee small hours that emphasise our loneliness and the reality of our situations. FoS x

  • Bjc67
  • Bjc67's Avatar
  • Senior Member
  • Senior Member
12 May 12 #330103 by Bjc67
Reply from Bjc67
John - Hang on in there! The so called people in our lives who say they "love" us then drop us the next day aren''t even worth missing. I know exactly where you are coming from though but things, as they say, can surely only get better.
What a process we have to go through to get there though, every day and night brings its challenges.
Next step for me is to repaint/ decorate virtually the whole house as she only did it a month or so before she left me. Now that is a reminder that has to go !
We can and WILL get through this emotional hell, what I keep saying to myself is she even remotely missing me or thinking of me, NO ! It will get better John.

  • raybird
  • raybird's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
12 May 12 #330109 by raybird
Reply from raybird
i remember in the early days waking myself up talking to IT.,then trying to put my arm around IT, but IT wasnt there, that hit me hard, i got through it, so will you, take care xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • johnt153
  • johnt153's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
12 May 12 #330133 by johnt153
Reply from johnt153
Hello all.

Have let myself and you all down - riven with loneliness and pain I left her a message in the small hours telling her how much I love her (nothing back, of course). Idiot; that''s all the power back to her. And as of yesterday officially unemployed and so hunting about for pennies. Partner gone. Business gone. Life really wasn''t supposed to be like this.


  • pixy
  • pixy's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
12 May 12 #330135 by pixy
Reply from pixy
You have let no one down. This is just the sort of setback that happens to decent caring human beings. You will have lots more backsliding to cope with and for a long time you will think that backsliding outweighs the steps forward. It doesn''t. No matter how many reverses occur you really will keep moving forward, a tiny step at a time

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11