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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


Worry

  • afonleas
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02 Jun 12 #334685 by afonleas
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Hiya BC
Hope u ok this afternoon,like we said last night it''s all about control and by controlling the hurt they inflict both men and women.
I know u are scared so are we all but things can only get better, u can retrain,u will get stronger the both of us r getting fit ready to take them all on, ha ha, out of all this negatives can only come positives i know it''s hard to see that now but one day it will become a reality.
The both of us have to support someone special and we will do it together and possibly learn something about ourselves in the process, okay it''s dull today but somewhere in the world the sun is shining and your life will shine again,i know.
Sat watching wales and the barbarians at the moment and wales just won30 21 so the sun started to come out for me now luv and cwtches xxx

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03 Jun 12 #334880 by blonde cazza
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You are right afonleas!...meant to ask you last night what part of wales are you from...my family is from Aberdare! xxx

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03 Jun 12 #334892 by yellowrose
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So many wise words and yes I know it''s all tru, but it''s so hard sometimes to stay positive. I don''t have to retrain and have a full time job which is an awful lot more than a lot of people but I am still really scared. I think it''s the fact it''s imposed on you. If I analyse my relationship with the bast..d there is so much I don''t miss, and so much I''m glad has gone but the reality of coping alone just overwhelms me sometimes.

YR xxxxxx

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03 Jun 12 #334896 by sillywoman
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Health is wealth - money didn''t save Robin Gibb at age 62.

I too constantly worry. Once my daughter leaves for uni in a couple of years time I wont be able to afford the mortgage on the house.

But we all have choices. I could move into somewhere smaller, rent and blow the small amount of equity on travelling or stay put and get a lodger.

As Marshy says, bless him, we women are strong. The population would be tiny if men could give birth ;)They couldn''t take the pain more than once!!

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03 Jun 12 #334898 by afonleas
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Yes when we analyze what our lives are now and what they were,it''s no wonder we are afraid.
I was married for 30 years and then all of a sudden not good enough anymore i was expecting a younger and pretty OW,how wrong i was!1 year younger than me a shedload of debtand totally dysfuntional family.
I sometimes think that he hsa undergone a lobotomy without anyone telling me,when i questioned him about the ***** his reply SHE IS DIFFERANT!
What am i supposed to make of that?we had everything we could want but obviously not what he wanted,ok he is the onelosing out on his life and his daughters, my youngest thought the sun shone from her dad''s backside but she does never want to speak to him again.
Back to the post i am afraid no matter what bullshit i tell you but i would rather be afraid than be with him,BC i know in your case it''s differant but know you are still afraid my luv and cwtches to u

just outside blackwood not far away xxx

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03 Jun 12 #334903 by blonde cazza
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Im not only scared but am angry...am angry that not only was i left to sell our marital house and box it all up but it makes me angry to hear that his parents are helpng him out to purchase new items for his house yet i who house his son has been left to decorate and do up this new house.All the fake promises he made of carrying on paying 600 a month maintenance helping painting this house!
My daughter has bullemia and convinced my ex i was having an affair but i wasnt its all lies...wheres my apology from them...and the really sad part is he knows shes vry ill but wont get her help!

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04 Jun 12 #334955 by julie321
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Blonde Cazza

This is how I feel too angry. STBX just left to be with OW and I had to deal with the fallout. Distraught daughter, houseto maintain, bills to pay, three dogs which were not my idea but I could not part with them now.

I am no at the point of selling house yet but I will have to do that too, but what angers me most is that because of his actions of supporting OW when she said she didn''t want him anywhere I was going to be I am now cut off from all his family too. This doesn''t bother me particularily but hurts the kids as they know they will never have family weddings or occasions when all their family are there because I am no longer welcome by is family so they will have to choose whether to have me at their significant events or dad and his family and all because he hadn''t the b*lls to tell this woman to grow up.

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