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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


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Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


devastated, angry,upset

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21 Aug 12 #350940 by honeybeeee
Topic started by honeybeeee
Husband wants divorce. Right out of blue.
He is citing me for unsuitable behavior.

You name it, & in his eyes I''ve done everything......

At 1st thought that it would blow over. MALE MENOPAUSE & all that...

BUT no, he is deadly serious.

Reading this site, I now know that I''m not the only !, but by ech sure feels it at this moment in time.....

Not long moved into this area,so really have had not much time to strike up any friendships.
Apart from anything, he was my best friend, & confidente.

I was bought up to keep a tight reign on my emotions, "stiff upper lip " You don''t let the world know what or how you are feeling! "Can''t let the old team down girlie, now can we?"


I want to scream & shout,but that would only bore the socks off people.

Not only have we not lived in this area v.long, but I am "AN EMPTY NESTER" to boot.

Can''t stop crying....

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21 Aug 12 #350955 by happyagain
Reply from happyagain
Hi honeybeee, sorry to find you here.
What reasons has your husband actually given for this?
Use this site to rant, scream, whatever you need to do. Keeping your emotions locked up is not good for you and you will need to let off steam righ now :(

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21 Aug 12 #350957 by honeybeeee
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Hi happyagain, I''m clingy, over demanding of his time & patience.To dependent on him financially,emotionally.I''ve become to much of a loner, now that children have flown nest. I''ve changed in every respect over the years...
The list goes on.....
On my feeling okish hour or to I think that ok maybe it is time for me to grow a spine...


But,rest of time I''m a bubbling jellyfish..
At first, when this blew up, I

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21 Aug 12 #350978 by happyagain
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In my book, these aren''t really reasons for ending a marriage. Has he ever mentioned these issues before? Do you agree with him?

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21 Aug 12 #350982 by Action
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Hi honeybee

Sorry to hear of your situation but you''re in good company here. It might be time to break the habits of a life-time and do some screaming, shouting and crying.

You''ll get lots of support on here as well as vital information.

How long ago did he drop the bombshell and has his behaviour been any different lately, i.e. could there be another woman? Sorry to ask this but it seems to be quite a common pattern I''m afraid.

Look after yourself and keep posting.

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21 Aug 12 #350986 by Canuck425
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Early days for you. Your job right now is to survive each day and to take care of yourself. This will be a long journey and it may not end up in divorce. Talk, talk, talk to lots of people. Get the support you need.

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22 Aug 12 #351041 by honeybeeee
Reply from honeybeeee
Yes to a degree.
We both agreed that I should be a F/T Mum when the chilren came along.
However,I cont''d to Work P/T coz we needed the money!!

Emotionally,well if you can''t talk to/confide in to your Husband....

Yes my confidence & self esteem over time went down & down. So much so that when we moved here,the prospect of finding a job was daunting to say the least.
I''m a born worrier, & I worried that what ever job I did "can I do it?what if I messed up?" So much so that that I would wake up in middle of the night."Can I do it/can''t I do it"

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This legally binding agreement defines how assets (e.g. properties and pensions) are to be divided.


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