A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


Feel so angry again

  • AngieP
  • AngieP's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
23 Jul 14 #440362 by AngieP
Reply from AngieP
Wow sb - powerful stuff. It is all so sad and such a waste. Sounds like you are doing a great job as a dad and maintaining a good relationship with your girls.

Finding myself sad and angry at every turn of events now, but trying my best to keep things in perspective. Have just spent two days tidying and cleaning my lovely home ready for estate agent photos. House that we totally gutted and refurbished and everything designed and chosen to suit. So much effort, so much waste. Tell myself it''s only a house but it still hurts. Your post has helped me sb - thanks.

I know anger is destructive long term but I think it will be a long time before I am able to truly let go of mine. I am trying.

  • stillbreathing
  • stillbreathing's Avatar
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
More
23 Jul 14 #440397 by stillbreathing
Reply from stillbreathing
I am very lucky in many ways...I know this but I am still furious and I am beginning to really accept my anger if that makes any sense at all. Before it felt like it was mixed up with bitterness and fear and so I tried to expunge it from myself. Didn''t want to be carrying that load around with me. Now I see I must until it dissipates. I think and hope it''s part of the healing process.

Angie. So sorry to hear about what has happened to you. You seem remarkably stoic and brave about it. I sense you are a peaceful person at heart. I am so sorry about your lost dreams...and mine too and my children''s.

So now I see myself as an angry red in the face dude that''s battling with a raft and himself as he shoots down the life river angry that he hit a rapid that took him through the swamp rather than the lush green meadow. But do have faith that a lusher, greener meadow is on the other side with fairer and sweeter maidens. I hope :)

Take care - good buddies on this forum. X

  • Shoegirl
  • Shoegirl's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
23 Jul 14 #440401 by Shoegirl
Reply from Shoegirl
Feel for you AngieP.

I blogged last year about saying goodbye to my house. It was my choice, it wasn''t the same thing. However, it broke my heart to leave my beautiful house. But like you it was important to me that the house looked it''s best for the photos and the viewings. I too told myself that it was only a house. But a friend sent me a beautiful card with just the right poem that summed up why it was so hard. My house had become part of me. So, so true. And another goodbye amongst a million others and more loss. And I got to choose whether I moved and it was still incredibly hard. How much harder is it for those who don''t get the choice? I can only wonder and offer my heartfelt sympathy.

Many comforts came to help me along the way. I got to sell to a wonderful young couple who described what I had created as the house of their dreams. It was wonderful to see their excitement and joy. I got an offer in less than a week, testament to my hard work and effort in presenting it I reckon.

Here I am in my new house nearly exactly one year on from that day where I cried my eyes out as I faced the prospect of saying goodbye to my last house. Workmen are now downstairs in my not so new place now and with every job, every little mark and change I make to this new place, it becomes part of me once more.

What you lose can be rebuilt when it becomes a matter of bricks and mortar. The heart just takes time to catch up. But this time, in this house it feels so much better. Because it''s mine not his. He was never a part of what I am building here. And that means everything.

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11