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Hurting

  • BrittanySade87
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23 Sep 18 #503956 by BrittanySade87
Topic started by BrittanySade87
Hello, I been married for 11 years..I have 4 kids and lost! My husband had affairs and I continue to take him back, and the last affair few months ago damaged me. Last affair my husband told me to find someone else. I didnt accept what he was telling me and was truly hurt. Weeks went by and a man did approach me, very kind and caring. We been talking for months and my husband knows and has been angry, Stalking me and threating to hurt this guy. My husband claims hes a changed man and knew what he is loosing. I tried to accept him again for my kids and i am not happy. I want to leave my marriage and be happy. I took enough of betrayal, All I get is from family that I am leaving my marriage for another man. No one see the hurt I been through. Let me put that he has cheated on me numerous times! Am I in the wrong??

Thank you

  • stay positive
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29 Sep 18 #504110 by stay positive
Reply from stay positive
Everyone has a right to be happy. Do what is right for you and not what others want you to do.

The hurt does not go away but it fades

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05 Oct 18 #504231 by Mollydoll
Reply from Mollydoll
You are absolutely not in the wrong your husband is, this is likely to be how he's made you feel, he's had plenty of chances, if you've found someone kind and caring, take that chance, I don't suppose your husband will like it, but you deserve this.

Cheating husbands can make you feel very low, that's where I am, but in time I hope I'll realise I'm worth so much more, you are too, go for it!

Family may take a while to realise the truth, I know that hurts, but it's likely they will see the truth in time too.

Hope all goes well xx

  • IvorProblem
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09 Nov 18 #504772 by IvorProblem
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After receiving irreparable damage from multiple infidelities you are entirely justified.

Do make your own decision

However, ultimately, I did leave a previous partner due to similar mistreatment. I now hope to have found a more caring soul.

  • BrittanySade87
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09 Nov 18 #504790 by BrittanySade87
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Thank you for that! I am damaged from muliple infidelities and feel I made so many sacrifices of fixing our marriage, Mentally and physically tired of all this...I know I did my best but time for me to move on....

  • jenson
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09 Dec 18 #505258 by jenson
Reply from jenson
BrittanySade87 wrote:

Thank you for that! I am damaged from muliple infidelities and feel I made so many sacrifices of fixing our marriage, Mentally and physically tired of all this...I know I did my best but time for me to move on....



I truly feel for you I was in a very damaging relationship my stbx wife never allowed me to sleep in the same room as her for 5 years, she claimed I snored. She was Violant throughout the marriage throwing things at me even attacked me with a knife. She started working as a make up artist she says, I had no proof. She would come home at midnight and often stay away for the weekend.Almost every penny i earnet was shipped off to her family now the house I live in which my father gave 67% for he sold his home to live with me is in jeopardy and not only me but my 80 year old father could loose our home. It transpires my stbx was having affairs and she had got pregnant when with me and hence why she ran off to her country off origin and filed for divorce. She has left the child and come back to get everything she can get.


I kept the marriage going as I came from a divorced back ground, My point is you have to do what you feel is right I knew I should have got out earlier, I never due to pressure from others etc and thought it would work i was always unhappy felt alone in a marriage where i had no love and care. I became depressed and even contemplated suicide and was seen by the crises team I hated myself.

I am so much happier even now I am out of my damaging relationship, I have met someone since we filed for divorce and she is a great soul even so she helps me with the divorce side of things. Yes I am worried finically and this could be totally devastating for me I could become homeless and so could me father who gave everything. Its horrible but the piece of mind I get out of being away from a nasty individual who made me miss arable even then I wish my stbx the best and hopefully she finds real happiness.

Just get out look after yourself and your children put yourself first and take it slow with any new relationship you are clearly hurt and maybe jaded by everything. Everthing will go well in the end and you will look back and say how did I stay with a person who treated me so ban and took advantage of my kind nature. Sorry for the waffle and going on a bit take care.

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