Good Afternoon, I am struggling with the whole WhatsApp and message abuse from my ex.
My situation is that my ex has a solicitor as we agreed mutually the financials and also the custody, in order to get the paperwork all signed off and to the court.
In the meantime i have a new partner and my ex has met her (2 weeks ago). She also has a partner who i have not met yet. We have 2 kids aged 7 and 9 and they know about our 'friends'.
Right now everything single thing i say or do is stated that i am not making my kids the priority or my number 1 is my new partner. I have always been there for my kids and i have never let them down or swapped any dates for my new partner. My kids come first.
In the current climate of home schooling i am trying to accommodate around work meetings/calls etc when i can have the kids. I have offered many days/hours etc over the last week and forthcoming week. I get told stop making your partner a priority. I am working, this is now becoming via text very abusive on a daily basis. I keep saying what is you want, more money, more custody etc.... Which nothing comes from the Solicitors. I know its an element of change and someone new is the life but i am trying to look after the kids also.
Daily messages range from 30-50 messages to maybe my 5. I try not to reply but i am getting nowhere. I am not sure what i can do as the solicitor looks like the only way but everything is agreed as about to be signed for ready for court (financials, court order and custody). I cannot speak to my ex without it now being about my new partner, and even to the point when my kids are being brought into it. The comments of the kids see shes a priority, the kids see you don't come and see them etc. I am scared to talk to my kids as i feel that she is pressuring them. My kids are great with me and the situation so i feel this is a lie to get to me. We were friends and trying to achieve this amicably but right now the abuse and mental torture i cannot cope with. Any help/advice greatly appreciated. As an FYI i dont think mediation will work as the answers she is looking for is not whats in her head!
Sounds like she has a lot of regret a lot of bitterness. If you are using solicitors just have a standard reply to her, please refer your questions/comments to your solicitor. Otherwise, dont reply, period, as long as you reply she will keep coming.
Keep a standard reply up, dont answer any questions etc she is bitter about your new parter, she is obviously not happy with hers.
Only you can break the chain, she sounds narcissistic.
It's happening also to me but my x is using my Daughter as a way of you don't care and keep on asking' for more money while she is staying within the family home on benefits well I've been moving from pillar to post for the past 8 months life on hold until my x gets found out lying to get an order (No proof) but a very good Drama come, actor. It's all a waiting game for me but Gaslighting comes to mind sending through texts 11 pm/midnight etc, making stuff up so my mind is working overtime as it has not been smooth sailing at all. Nothing worse at all than Texts etc but do keep all as evidence and if need to go to the police for help but could make it worse (myself have held off because it could tip her over the edge I'm thinking about the children but at the end of the day the truth will come out. But if you have any help direction how you had dealt with it please advise. (Thanks)