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Separation advice needed

  • emmavix
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16 Aug 10 #219490 by emmavix
Topic started by emmavix
My friend has just been told by her husband that he wants a separation. She is pregnant with their first baby (4 weeks pregnant though IVF). He has also said that he'd like to stay on in the matrimonial home & keep their car. She has stayed away from home since this announcement but I am concerned that she should be staying in the house to stake her claim. She's self-employed & won't be taking on much work having just managed to get pregnant. He is employed but probably can't afford to pay the mortgage alone and/or move out & rent somewhere else.

Any advice for her? Should she stay at home or can she come & stay with us & be looked after for a few weeks?



  • Lostboy67
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16 Aug 10 #219542 by Lostboy67
Reply from Lostboy67
The general advice I've seen is not to move out but that may be specific to guys. There has been a few posts that say it makes little difference in the end. Its difficult to see how he can keep the FMH if he can't afford the mortgage, your friend has housing needs that need to be met,particularly given that there is a baby on the way.
I am not sure what you friends s2bx expects her to do? Leave him with the home and the car and just go and sort her life out....well that just isn't in the real world....

I salute you for supporting your friend, she will certainly be needing it....

Take care

  • NellNoRegrets
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17 Aug 10 #219546 by NellNoRegrets
Reply from NellNoRegrets
Firstly, is this just nerves on his part about becoming a father or are they really headed for divorce?

As for practicalities, if her name is on the house deeds she has a stake in it. If her name isn't she needs to register with the Land Registry that she has an interest in the property so he can't sell it without her knowledge.

What he'd like to do - keep the house and the car - is one thing - what will actually happen is another. The overriding priority is to ensure the baby is housed. All assets of the marriage - house, car, pensions, savings - will be divided in the light of that.

Right now I expect your friend would rather be with people to support her than sharing a roof with the man who has upset her.

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