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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Starting the Divorce Process

  • Momo65
  • Momo65's Avatar Posted by
  • Junior Member
  • Junior Member
19 Mar 12 #318914 by Momo65
Topic started by Momo65
Hi I wonder if anyone can assist - before I start to trawl the internet again. I have decided that I should take the initiative and begin divorce proceedings.

We have been married for 7.5 years and lived together for 9 months prior to the marriage. No children from the marriage. Husband has an 8 year old daughter from a previous relationship who he has access to every weekend.

Husband asked to end the marriage as of 1st January 2012. I moved out of marital home on 27 January in to a shared flat. Mortgage is in both names as are the title deeds.
No joint accounts/credit cards/loans. I paid utility bills and H paid the mortgage. Both of us have cars but no joint loands on either of these.

I have a flat in Scotland which I bought prior to meeting husband. My niece currently rents this from me which covers the mortgage (interest only). The Mortgage and title deeds to this are in my name only. I released £20k equity from the property to use as deposit to buy the marital home as husband had no savings or property to use. I released a further £10k from flat to address a dry rot problem in marital home. We have made some building improvements to house which husband funded.
Phew - still with me.....
I have 2 final salary pension schemes, one from previous employer and one from exisiting. Husband has no pension/savings.

Both of us are in full time employment - husband earns roughly 2.5 X my salary - hence the reason he stayed on in the marital home. We paid £200,000 for house in 2005. Mortgage totla is now about £154,00. We have not had the property valued but judging by the market at the moment we probably wouldn''t get back what we have shelled out for it. Flat in Scotland has only about £5k equity in it - so would be paying an estate agent for the privellage of selling it and not making any money.

No other assets as such.
Husband reckons that he should give me roughly £30k lump sum (so that I do not walk away worse off than when we got married). This would allow me a deposit to buy a smaller property for myself.

a) Does this sound fair and reasonable for both of us? I have no desire to put him in a financial quagmire but also have to look after myself going forward.
b) Can I Petition for a divorce (DIY)and we agree the settlement that way or do we agree between us and just present the court with our decision....?
c) Husband has not requested any share of the flat or my pensions. (we have shared the costs of ongoing maintenance of flat during our marriage)

I am trying not to get in to a ''fight'' over finances as I know my husband is very manipulative and can also get very ars*y about money - I don''t want to bring out his vindictive side if I can avoid it. So would like to keep things on an ''amicable'' footing if possible. I have only taken a small portable tv and 2 sets of bedside drawers from the marital home - but at some point will need to reclaim small items from the property - I am happy to not start arguing over who gets the bed/washing machine or dining table - although I will have to furnish anywhere I end up buying.

So back to my questions - best method of divorce - is DIY ok for us to consider (I would like to site UB just so we can get it over and done with sooner rather than having to wait for 2 years sep)?
Would a financial Separation Agreement be accpetable under our circumstances? Can''t afford to pay for sols fees.

Any advice welcomed.

  • WhiteRose
  • WhiteRose's Avatar
  • Moderator
  • Moderator
19 Mar 12 #318924 by WhiteRose
Reply from WhiteRose
Hi Momo,

I think you need to break it down into Divorce and Finances, have a look at this link which shows the process:


DIY is fine - UB - maybe get him to agree the statement ''facts'' they need to be enough to ensure the Judge is convinced the marriage is over, by agreeing them with your stbx, you can diffuse the anger and upset when they receive the Petition. Costs can be awarded to the respondent or split between you.


If you are in agreement you can use the managed service Wiki offers:


I think the key thing is agreement - it gets more costly (emotionally as well as financially) if you''re unable to agree.

WR x

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