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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

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Unreasonable behaviour

  • arbeerich
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07 Apr 12 #322272 by arbeerich
Topic started by arbeerich
My wife has petitioned divorce and cited 6 examples of unreasonable behaviour. They include detailed accounts of my physical behaviour towards her that find difficult reading.
If I agree to the divorce based upon he reasons will I be leaving myself open to possible prosecution?
If I do agree, will these reasons appear on any paperwork for the future? ie. will she be able to show the kids and use it drive them away from me?

  • fairylandtime
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08 Apr 12 #322285 by fairylandtime
Reply from fairylandtime
Hi arbeerrich

You could agree that the marriage has irrevocably broken own but that you do not agree with the reasons stated in the Petition.

I don''t think many people agree on these reasons, as for me they were really hard reading & some were factually incorrect but I wrote my side & left it at that - no point fighting as it will only cost you more in the long run.


  • soulruler
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08 Apr 12 #322290 by soulruler
Reply from soulruler
There is a new precedent just come out of family division which is for non fault divorce.

In that case there was a long marriage and no violence but the man just decided that he no longer wanted to be married to his wife.

The wife objected to his Petition siting that the only thing she could fault her husband for was I think bringing meat into the house.

However, Lord Justice Thorpe stated that he should get his divorce. I think that this is right.

I agree with the other poster, do not get wound up with the reasons for the divorce - judges see this every day.

Just state that you agree that the marriage has broken down but if there are allegations of violence which you disagree with state on your reply that you were not violent (or what ever the reasons are) in your response to the Petition.

Do not be tempted to contest the divorce or hold up returning the petition.

In my case my husband left (and was extremely violent) but when I petitioned for divorce he refused to acknowledge receipt and so my divorce goes on and on and on - 4 years later I am still not divorced and it is now obvious to every court in the land that my husband is extremely violent, very controlling and totally abusive.

Best way to "prove" the allegations wrong is to behave responsibly and not rise to the bait.

  • Fiona
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08 Apr 12 #322432 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
It''s a little more tricky when there are serious allegations relating to abuse or children. To cover your back what you can do is agree the divorce and disagree the allegations reserving your right to defend them should they be raised again.

  • arbeerich
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09 Apr 12 #322515 by arbeerich
Reply from arbeerich
Thank you all, I think I get the picture. So, I accept her reasons for divorce and then I am guessing from the advice above that I''ll have some way of writing a response to the Petition when it is sent to me?
Do I write my response on the petition when I receive it or on a seperate "letter" and return it with the Petition.
I certainly don''t want to contest the divorce but I would like to disagree with some of the content of "grounds"

  • dukey
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09 Apr 12 #322520 by dukey
Reply from dukey
When the Petition comes from court a form called D10 acknowledgment of service accompanys it, this is the form you use to reply to the court.

So on D10 you write something like, i accept the marriage has broken down but i refute all allegations made in section six (reason) of the divorce application.

Its best to write to the applicant/solicitor and do the same, also agreeing costs from the outset.

So to the applicant/solicitor you could write something like, while i accept the marriage has broken down i will only sign the acknowledgment of service on the basis that none of the allegations made are raised at any future proceedings, i will also require an agreement regarding the costs of the suit (the divorce costs).

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