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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Unreasonable behaviour - time limits?

  • iusedtolovehim
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09 Apr 12 #322588 by iusedtolovehim
Topic started by iusedtolovehim
Hi
Husband walked out 2 months ago. He is living in a rented room near his work, he says there is OW (also married, she intends to divorce). I have no reason to disbelieve this.

He has not been in touch since (he did see our kids of 20 and 18 yesterday for lunch).

We have been married 20+ years, we both work full time, he earns 4x my salary.

I do want to divorce him. There is no chance of a reconciliation (from either side). If I can''t prove adultery there are many instances of unreasonable behaviour. But what would happen if I (and he) did nothing? I guess what I''m getting at is this - if after 6 months or so nobody had done anything is unreasonable behaviour still grounds? To be honest, it''s lovely not having him around, the house is calm, I don''t have to put up with his foul language and bullying, the bills are paid. I am confident he won''t stop paying the mortgage, he doesn''t want his credit rating shot to pieces, I can pay gas/elec etc from my wages. I certainly don''t want to remarry, he probably does.

I am pretty sure he will be waiting for me to Petition him - what if I don''t? After a period of time would we have to wait for a 2 year separation?

Don''t get me wrong, I want to divorce. If a few years down the line we can be civil for the kids that will be good. But the status quo suits me at the moment. Every month that passes is another 1k on his pension fund and another mortgage payment made.

Am I missing something?!

  • perin123
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09 Apr 12 #322596 by perin123
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Hi, it is easier to Petition for UB instead of adultery. You need about 5 reasons. If you wait 6 months it makes no difference. If you were still living together then that is when it makes a difference as you would be seen as accepting his behaviour.

Think I''ve got that right!! If not some knowledgeable wiki will put me right!!

You say you are confident he wont stop paying mortgage? Is it in both names? Are you both on the deeds? Yes his credit rating will be shot if he stops, but so will yours if it is joint. My ex stopped paying 8 months ago and as much as I would love his credit rating shot as he has a new business, I don''t want dragging down with him...

Keep posting on here you will get lots of help x

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