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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


  • Dancingsar
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25 Apr 12 #326600 by Dancingsar
Topic started by Dancingsar
I told my husband yesterday that I want a divorce after obtaining proof and a confession that he had committed adultery.

I told my family yesterday the situation and have their full support. I told him to tell his parents and because they are elderly and to tell his brother to support them.
His brother has said he has disowned him!!!!
He went and told his parents who have a spare room and I thought he would move in there. But his parents haven''t offered for him to move in... Only if things get really bad!!!!

He is sleeping on the sofa as we have no spare room. But I am now spending the evening upstairs in my bedroom whilst he is downstairs.
He has said he won''t move out until finances have been sorted and he knows what he''s budget wiill be to rent.
The mortgage is in joint names.
Just feel that this is an impractical situation especially when we have got a 10 year old daughter who will be confused... And I want him out!!!!

  • fairylandtime
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25 Apr 12 #326605 by fairylandtime
Reply from fairylandtime
Hi dancingsar

You cant force him out - sorry :(

I have been lucky in that X left I suppose but we did spend virtually years leading separate lives before that.

There are many on here (will prob follow on soon) who have / do live with each other while everything gets sorted some successfully others not.

Its really hard as you are angry now but this will pass (honest) no tbh it will come & go with differing severity. But you will get through it.

I would try mediation if you can to sort out contact & finances - really hard (I know) but is worth it in terms of cost & hassle.

For now - breath, let it sink in, scream (into a pillow if you have to) or go for a good speed walk & look after yourself. You are going to need all your energy & strength for what is to come.

Look after yourself & stay strong


  • Marshy_
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26 Apr 12 #326628 by Marshy_
Reply from Marshy_
Hi DancingStar. I agree with fairylandtime. U cant force him to leave.

One thing I want to tell you is that although you have the support of his family right now, that may not last. Blood is thicker than water. This may not be that important to you though. But just stay calm. Walk your way thru this process and stick to your guns. But what will be will be with his folks. C.

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