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STBX wants to take children on holiday abroad

  • ANNE1234
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15 May 12 #330755 by ANNE1234
Topic started by ANNE1234
I am about to start divorce proceedings on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour.

I wonder about STBX''s mental health at times. He walked out of our business and has sat at home for 6 months doing absolutely nothing except a few days casual work for a pal. No money forthcoming towards mortgage etc. The house is on the market. He is not claiming any benefits as far as I know or seeking work. He says he has paid the mortgage for some years so now I can keep him. We live in a terrible atmosphere with verbal abuse at times.

His parents live in Portugal and he has suddenly announced, without any consultation with me, that grandma in Portugal has asked if the children want to go over there in summer.

I think he is wrong to assume this is OK with me and that I have no plans of my own. I would not expect to take the children away without consulting him first. Perhaps the children think I would accompany them which is why they said they would like to go. STBX is not father of the year and is an angry, aggressive person. His first wife went off to Australia with his young child and never returned. How do I know he won''t do the same as he has nothing to come back here for. I am sure he might think I could do the same and would obstuct any plans I might have!

I also think he is depressed. He has come out with a comment about bi-polar asking what it is as somebody had got away with murder due to being diagnosed with it. These comments hardly instill faith in him with regard to being alone with the children and away from me.

Does anybody know whether I have any rights to stop him taking them away. I have the passports and they are safe. I will try to file papers ASAP.


My question is: can I legally stop him from taking the children a. abroad or b. away from home.

  • Fiona
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15 May 12 #330762 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
Strictly speaking consent from those with PR for a child or permission from the courts is required for a parent to take children abroad on holiday unless there is a residence order in that parent''s favour. However, you cannot unreasonably refuse consent for the usual week or fortnight''s holiday abroad once or twice a year.

Portugal is a signatory to the Hague Convention on international child abduction so if children are retained outside the UK they will be returned to the jurisdiction of the UK courts. IF you ever need it the Reunite website has a lot of resources for the prevention of international child abduction and can advise about international contact. there is also a list of solicitors who are experienced in this field.

Welfare concerns might be a reason to withhold consent to go on holiday when there is evidence. Lack of trust or being difficult and behaving differently when separating isn''t uncommon and it''s unlikely that a court wouldn''t grant permission for those reasons alone. On the other hand when children are very young and not used to being away from the parent with the majority of care at night they might struggle being away for a whole week whether the holiday is in the Uk or abroad.

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