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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Self employed stbx

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24 May 12 #332582 by Northernboy
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Hypothetical question, if you STBX was self employed person who got xxx amounts of cash in hand but only said they got xx amount through the books could you claim it as one of the reasons for unreasonable behaviour in stating that she never contributed to the bills in the FMH with her peanuts of a wage or put any money into the joint account. Which caused me great stress as I was worried about the bills each month.

Cause this would really get her mad but if she hasn''t declared the xxx amounts what can she say?

I''m never going to be able to prove she gets the extra money but i know what she really gets as I''ve been with her while she run the business, if you get what I mean!

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24 May 12 #332583 by Northernboy
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Oh and she says I''m not entitles to any of her business even though we set it up together and paid for it from our joint account (re mortgaged for funds) but the shop is only in her name!

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24 May 12 #332588 by cookie2
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Northernboy wrote:

could you claim it as one of the reasons for unreasonable behaviour in stating that she never contributed to the bills in the FMH with her peanuts of a wage or put any money into the joint account. Which caused me great stress as I was worried about the bills each month.

How long has this lack of contribution been going on for? If it''s recent (started in the last 6 months), then yes you can use it. If she''s been doing it for years then you have accepted it for all that time so why is it suddenly causing you stress all of a sudden?

Cause this would really get her mad

Why do you want to get her mad? This is counter-productive in a divorce case.


All of this "hypothetical question" is regarding the legal side of the divorce, not the financial split. The 2 are not related. Just because you use this in the UB does not give you any advantage in the financial resolution.

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24 May 12 #332589 by Northernboy
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I don''t want her to get mad that''s the point. I can see this getting messy but I just can''t afford to defend anything if she want to cross the unreasonable behaviour Petition for adultery.

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24 May 12 #332591 by cookie2
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Northernboy wrote:

Oh and she says I''m not entitles to any of her business even though we set it up together and paid for it from our joint account (re mortgaged for funds) but the shop is only in her name!

That is another matter entirely :)

The business would be taken into account along with all the other marital assets. A lot of it would also depend on the nature of the business etc. Since you say it is a shop I assume it has actual value rather than being simply an earning vehicle. But lets say for example her earnings are £20k, if you took half of her business away then it might collapse and her earnings would be zero. Then you would be increasing your vulnerability to spousal maintenance.

It makes sense to come to agreement rather than take what you can get. If she wants the business then you could let her have that in exchange for something else, say more FMH equity or keeping your pension, etc.

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24 May 12 #332594 by cookie2
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Northernboy wrote:

I just can''t afford to defend anything if she want to cross the unreasonable behaviour Petition for adultery.

She won''t. It would be a waste of her time and money to do that. Nobody but the most unreasonable people in the country ever defends a divorce. It is extremely rare because it''s extremely unlikely to succeed.

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24 May 12 #332595 by Northernboy
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I wish she did say she earned 20k, half it and half it again then you''d be somewhere near. That''s the official line you''d be to low with the 20k she actual gets unofficially!

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