DECREE ABSOLUTE

Well, I''m officially divorced (decree arrived in the post today). I don''t know if he is aware - will his solicitor let him know?

It all feels very strange, 30+ years of marriage ''dissolved''. I shed a few tears even though my EX HUSBAND makes my skin crawl and I despise him for the way he has treated me. I will be so very glad when the FMH is sold and I can be really free of him. The divorce does not feel like an event to celebrate, but having my own place will be.

Thank you again all you lovely people for helping me to get this far.

Hello Action

The court will send his Absolute to his solicitor so yes they should inform him it was granted, for some reason some solicitors don`t pass it on, mostly in error i think, i suppose you could drop him a line to let him know.

If there is a bright side, and i like you did not see it as something to celebrate, it is that the Consent Order becomes binding and enforceable from now on, oh and its a warm sunny day.

Thank you Dukey. He''s already defaulting on the consent order as he is meant to pay half the mortgage until the house is sold.

I don''t think I can bring myself to tell him via email that we''re divorced as I would be too tempted to add something unhelpful along the lines of: "now you can carry on f_ _ _ ing anything that moves".

Must get out and enjoy the sunshine and take my bitter and twisted hat off.

Well i can understand why you don`t want to let him know, and yes get out and enjoy the big yellow thing in the sky.

Once he is a month behind you can enforce the terms of the order, i mean from the Absolute, unless another order was in place.

Going a bit off topic here but I''ve just sent him an email with the final Consent Order costs from my solicitor which we agreed to share.

My solicitor did all the work in preparing the order and submitting it to Court and his solicitor just advised him on the Content and signed it etc. I have had my invoices broken down so that any advice to me about the whole thing was paid by me and not split. Ex is now saying that I need to pay half his solicitor''s fees. I''ve already replied saying that I don''t intend to - how do I stand?

What does the order say Action, any mention of who pays what in terms of legal fee`s, if it says "No order as to costs" you both must pay your own, if it states different post the exact wording or send it as a pm if you like.

It says: ''The costs of and indidental to the Application to be paid by the parties equally''. So, if I''m expected to pay half his solicitor costs then he should be paying half of all of mine, not just the Consent Order bits?