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Still fuming after fathers day...

  • strongerthanithought
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18 Jun 12 #337369 by strongerthanithought
Topic started by strongerthanithought
OK so this might just be another rant but I need to get it off my chest..

Kids were coming back to dad''s yesterday, early as it was fathers day. So far so good..?

They were 1 1/2 hours late with pathetic excuse that could have very easily been worked around, with no phone call/text to advise of delay. Good job we weren''t going out for lunch!

And after being with mum all week they had no card or gift for their dad. Which might be acceptible if they weren''t on good terms, nice friendly chats at handover and at school etc etc.

Made worse by the fact that they had bought AND made cards AND gifts for mum''s bf.

And even worse by the fact that I helped them to make gifts and cards for their mum at mothers day after being at Dads all week.

Just checked my diary and its a whole year before I can un-return the favour grrrr

I know I''m being pathetic and girly (mixed with PMT too) but is it too much to ask that mum encourages the kids to make an effort for their Dad when she''s going really OTT for her bf?
I''m just sick of the continued ridiculous excuses - not just about this but on just about everything- I don''t want the kids to think that the way she is is ''normal'' and this is the icing on the cake.

The only redeeming point of the day was that when I dragged the kids to Tesco they were driving out of the car-park - they knew full well why we were there, but are so thick-skinned that she wouldn''t have even thought it was making me mad!!!

Meanwhile my own kids didn''t see their dad.

Hope any dads that could and wanted to see their kids were able to yesterday!

  • hattiedaw
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18 Jun 12 #337373 by hattiedaw
Reply from hattiedaw
It sounds like game playing and you''re letting it get to you.
Thankfully my son is an adult so I''m not involved with Fathers Day anymore.
My friend on the other hand does not make an effort for the father of her kids as he has never made the effort for her.
Rise above it, be the bigger person.
Good luck!

  • jslgb
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18 Jun 12 #337378 by jslgb
Reply from jslgb
When i was with my stbxh I always made sure I had all the special days covered for both my step-daughters mum and dad. When her mum met someone else and eventually remarried i left it to her new husband to buy her gifts as he lived with my step-daughter full time and we had her every other weekend.

When stbxh and i split i continued to buy my ex presents of our daughter for a while. He flat out refused to and i often had our 4/5 year old in tears. My mum and friends quickly realised this was going to be the norm and they always take my daughter out shopping close to any occasions.

There have been occasions where i havent bothered getting anything for my stbxh. We didnt bother at christmas last year and my daughter never asked, i found out soon after the OW had taken care of it, and for his birthday this year my daughter was completely and utterly ignored with any regards to it so again we didnt bother. For fathers day she made him a card at school and asked to bake him some muffins, so we did that and sent him a school picture too. I found out my ex-MIL had bought him gifts too which surprised me as she has little interaction with my daughter and has never done it before.

I think its kind of sad that my stbxh woke up on fathers day without either of is daughters there or anything actually off them. But he chose his lifestyle!

I guess the moral of the story is to not expect anything of your partners ex. My stxh''s 1st wife was very much the same, made a big song and dance of her new bf whoever it was at the time and ignored her daughters father.

I choose to do it for my daughter, not her dad.

  • Northernboy
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19 Jun 12 #337543 by Northernboy
Reply from Northernboy
I never got a card from my two kids or seen them on fathers day either, a text would have done me not a tweet saying fatherday what a joke or I wish you died but hey ho I''ll rise above it.

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