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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Disagreeing with grounds but agreeing to divorce

  • tula3000
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21 Aug 12 #350872 by tula3000
Topic started by tula3000
My wife has unilaterally contacted a solicitor and handed me a letter giving her grounds for wanting a divorce. I have struggled to accept the marriage is over, but now see there is no way back, given the things she has come up with as unreasonable behaviour. I cannot bring myself to accept her grounds as they are grossly exaggerated and make me sound like a monster, but I do now see that there is no hope of saving the marriage. Can I disagree with the grounds but still agree to the divorce, without that dragging it out into a contested divorce with the ensuing costs and delays?

  • Forseti
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21 Aug 12 #350880 by Forseti
Reply from Forseti
You haven''t really provided enough information for a detailed answer. As you say, contesting a divorce is expensive and ultimately futile. It depends a bit on why you want to refute the unreasonable behaviour cited and what it is.

One reason would be the avoidance of costs; another would be ensuring you have not by implication agreed to anything which might adversely affect future children or financial proceedings. Are there any children of the marriage? You want to ensure that there are no allegations of child abuse, domestic violence or financial impropriety: anything which might cause problems at a later date.

You could cross-petition, which is probably unnecessary, or if this is a draft Petition you could negotiate and agree not to defend if the petition is amended.

If the petition is not amended then fill out the D10 and add a brief statement about why you are defending the specific allegations.

  • dukey
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21 Aug 12 #350886 by dukey
Reply from dukey
There is a fairly standard way of dealing with this, so you write to the nice solicitor and say something like although i accept the marriage has broken down i deny all allegations raised in section six of D8, i will however sign D10 on the basis that costs are agreed beforehand and that none of the allegations be raised at any future hearings.

More often than not they just agree, its all part of the horse trading that solicitors do anyway.

  • cookie2
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21 Aug 12 #350895 by cookie2
Reply from cookie2
Yep what dukey said. You should reply that although you disagree with the grounds, you will not contest the divorce as long as no costs claim is filed.

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