My stbx has sent an email today saying he is going for a contact order and now wont be transporting his son home from a club on thursday nights (this was one of his initial requests at mediation to be more involved!)until the contact order is in place and CAFCASS have assessed the case!
He currently sees the children (3) every Wednesday when he picks them up from school and has them overnight taking them to school on Thursday.
He sees them every alternative weekend. (tho not this months as he was on holiday with OW altho I did offer to swop my weekend on his return which he turned down) He had them for 2 weeks in the summer in addition to Wednesdays and his weekends.
On Fathers Day he had contact with them even though it was my weekend. I invite him to the kids birthday parties (albeit reluctantly and he has never taken this up)
We alternate Christmas Day.
I am assuming he is now going to be asking for 50:50? All seems bizarre! Have just submitted Appication for AR so not sure what happens now!
well, if he''s applying for more contact, starting by reducing the time he spends with the childnre isn''t going to help him much!
Have you received any application from him?
It would be reasonable to write to him to say that you understand that he no longer wants to be involved with Son''s club on Thursdays. ask him to confirm whether he still wants to have the contacts on Wedneday night through to Thursday and on Alternate weekends.
Confirm that you remain happforthe cotnact, as agreed, to continue, and ask him waht he is proposing. It may be that he has some idea that the agreement ought to be in an order, or, as you say, he might be seeking more, in which case it would be sensibe for him to tell you what he wats, you might be able to agree!
Are you still in mediation? I would also suggest that youoffer to return to mediation to discuss any issues he has around the current contact arrangements.
Oh dear I must have worded that all wrong! Hes not threatening to keep them. One of my children goes to a club on a thursday night and ex used to bring him home afterwards. (his request). It suited me as I then didnt have to keep youngest awake to do late pick up...nothing I cant sort out as can do lift scheme with someone.
I was wondering why hes requesting contact order when to be fair he has pretty good arrangement and more importantly this has been ok with the kids.
He mentioned CAFCASS....he really has no idea about the court process at all! He is continually obstructive and challenging...my MK has said contact order will be a waste of his time...I guess time will tell! (despite being the one that left as he was "unhappy"...then accused me of having an affair and told the kids (!!) this is why he left. He then refused to accept divorce petition...resulting in using process server (again refused to accept papers)...then arrived in court to contest Decree Nisi with OW! Needless to say decree nisi was granted.
He has become someone I no longer recognise at all.