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advice needed

  • Gemma1982
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  • Junior Member
06 Sep 08 #46136 by Gemma1982
Reply from Gemma1982
Hi, i understand how you feel, i found a text on my husbands phone the other week, it was under a guys name, turns out it was a woman, when other stuff happened last week, like phone calls at all hours from that number, i challenged him, he tried to lie his way out of it, but i knew. We had a few problems before this happened, so hopefully you havn't and may be able to sort it out. I know how it feels and its horrible. xx

  • findingmyself
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06 Sep 08 #46151 by findingmyself
Reply from findingmyself
Hi safenet

This is such a terrible experience, I really feel for you. Sooner or later you are going to have to broach it, or it will cause more damage, and as yet you dont know what the truth is.

I found e-mail very helpful for saying what I couldnt say face to face, so maybe that or a letter would be one option, at least to raise the need to have a serious talk.

And what have I learned from my experience? What would i do differently if I was doing it again? I said too much - I had plenty of feelings to express and after stewing for days they poured out once I started. Don't talk, listen, just really listen.

finding xx

  • safenet
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07 Sep 08 #46246 by safenet
Reply from safenet
OK, thanks to you all for your advice.
I rang him tonight, he is out for the night.......and asked him if he was alone. He said he was. He asked why I asked and I said, 'so you are not with *****'?? (I know her name)
First he said 'no', then 'what you talking about'.
Then there was that awful, horrible, deathly silence which seemed to last for an hour, but was infact maybe 30 seconds. He said he will see me in the morning, and that was that.
So maybe at least now I have said something I might sleep a bit better tonight......having said that, it is 1.45am now??

I know her name and her place of work (her own business), website and of course mobile and work number. First instinct tonight was to ring her and blast her, but then I thought, you know, she may not know about me. I will wait and see what, if anything, tomorrow brings
Will be in touch

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