A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

desperately need help

  • bluefairy
  • bluefairy's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
11 Mar 08 #16529 by bluefairy
Topic started by bluefairy
hi all

I have been looking at this site for a few weeks hoping someone else may hav a similar problem to me. I'm amazed at some of the stories and need a fair bit of advice myself. So here goes..
I,v been married for 16 years have 3 kids aged 5,8 and 15.
Husband was bankrupt when we met but previously had building business. I was full time working and helped get him back on track, we then got married and after 1st child i went to college to help do paperwork for our new business which is still running. I carried on p/t work elsewhere as well. Then after 2nd and 3rd children I gave up other work to be full time mum, but continued with our business paperwork.
We are both 50% partners in building business and we have 3 properties in uk and one in Spain which is another seperate business also 50% partner in this, all uk properties are in my sole name spanish property in his sole name.
We have MH which is 4 bed semi with interest only mortgage of £207k valued at around 275k. 2 of uk properties are tenanted with approx. 20k equity in each, other uk property is up for sale with approx. 20k equity the spanish property is more vague but poss about 40k equity.
I have 15k put aside from sale of previous home. s2bx has sent a proposal saying I should resign from business sign MH over to him and offered me 38k out of it. also says I can hav proceeds from sale of house estimate 20k and he'll raise 5k each out of other houses. He says I can have 60% of Spanish home althou these can take very long time to sell. In total he is offering 68k and wants half of 15k in my account which would leave me with approx. 75k, I would need to purchase a house of approx. 180-200k to rehouse even if I get p/t work elsewhere i will struggle to pay a mortgage of over say 60k. He is offrering £150 per week maintenance 50 per child til educat ends. Figures don't add up, business has gone into debt of approx. 30k since divorce proceedings started any advice on outcome would be much appreciated.

sorry its so long and complicated tried to get as much info in as poss.


  • mike62
  • mike62's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
11 Mar 08 #16535 by mike62
Reply from mike62
Hi, welcome to Wikivorce. Messy business this divorce malarky!

Looking briefly at your figures:

FMH equity 68K
Rental1 equity 20K
Rental2 equity 20K
UK2 equity 20K
Spanish equity 40K
Cash in hand 15K

Total 183K

He wants to offer you £75K total? And you have 3 dependant kids under 15?

Think not. Starting point is at least £91.5K, before taking account of children's needs, and your needs.

As to the 30K deficit in business, I think you really know what is happening there.

His maintenance offer for kids of £50pw - He should be paying 25% of his nett income, based upon CSA rates. Are his nett drawings of the order of £1,800 per month?

On balance, I would agree, he is having a laugh. Perhaps if you were to post up some info about his and your income someone may be able to give you a better take on what would be realistic.

It is further complicated by the fact that he is undoubtedly self employed - he can claim he is drawing whatever he likes.

Post up some more info and see if anyone has any good ideas. Best of luck


  • bluefairy
  • bluefairy's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
11 Mar 08 #16537 by bluefairy
Reply from bluefairy
Hi Mike

So glad you replied, i'm tearing my hair out trying to get my head around everything. More info as follows;
both classed as self employed but he controls money always gave me £200 per week to buy food etc.. all other bills mortgage out of business.
As far as inland rev are concerned I earn half of yearly profit- previous year = 50k this years not complete yet but he says it will show a loss.
Still both in MH he won't move out until I sign house into his sole name, currently only one in joint names.
He's reduced the money he gives to me to £150 per week so I sometimes have to use some of 15k to top up for essentials and pay my sol. I cannot claim any benefits as he is still in house.
He can be very aggressive and there has been violence over the years, he is wearing me down some days I can hardly function. Kids haven't been told yet but the atmosphere at home is poor and has been for long time thats why I want divorce, can't take anymore. When I asked for divorce he went to sol before me and is divorcing me for unreasonable behaviour i.e I'm selfish!!!
You lot are keeping me sane, I look on here everyday for inspiration.

Thanks salina

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11

The modern, convenient and affordable way to divorce.

No-Fault Divorce £179

We provide the UK's lowest cost no-fault divorce service, managed by a well respected firm of solicitors. 

Online Mediation £250

Online mediation is a convenient and inexpensive way to agree on a fair financial settlement.

Consent Order £259

This legally binding agreement defines how assets (e.g. properties and pensions) are to be divided.

Court Support £250

Support for people who have to go to court to get a fair divorce financial settlement without a solicitor.