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Divorce : Help Required

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24 Mar 08 #17534 by gp126
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Hi,
I am seeking a divorce from my wife, and at the moment am confused and looking for advice. I live in the Cambridge area and I guess my fist question is Can anyone reccommend a good solicitor in Cambridge who specialises in divorce? I am not familiar with the process involved or timescales and am obviously worried about costs and entitlements. I also have a young son who is almost 3 years old, and from what I have read the system will be stacked against me w.r.t obtaining custody. My relationship has broken down due to my wifes heavy drinking and her staying out till the early hours. I don't think that there is anyone else involved (possibly naive) but my wife just seems to think that she can go out all night drinking etc (without contacting me) and i've had enough of it. Any help or support would be greatly appreciated. Books/reading material on the divorve process or links to good websites?

Thanks in Advance
G

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24 Mar 08 #17538 by dukey
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Hello Gp

Wellcome to the site your in the right place to learn the process a good start is to read the wiki step by step giude to divorce

Im sorry to hear your wifes drinking is so out of control perhaps if you sit her down and calmly explain that you can take no more and your son should come first she will consider seeking help.

If not and divorce is the only answer (i hope not) there is a list of sols on this site keep posting your questions you will find lots of help and support here.

I wish you well Gp

dukey

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24 Mar 08 #17539 by gp126
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Thanks for your reply Dukey,
Unfortunately I feel as though I have tried everything to control her drinking, I have spoken to her father about it, we have been to councelling (Relate) for 6 weeks, during which time she was as good as gold, as every week at councelling we discussed the previous weeks events. We stopped the councelling (on advice of councillor) as everything seemed to be going so well and it was difficult to find issues to discuss. However 4 weeks on and she has reverted to type; last night was the straw to break the camels back, after waiting up half the night I got a text at 3:10 saying she was staying at a friends house after being out all night. My opinion is the same as yours in that you would think she would be more responsible when we have our son to consider, unfortunately this is not the case. In an ideal world I would like to get custordy of my son, as I won't be around to keep an eye on her alcohol consumption. In the cold light of day I see divorce as the only way forward as her behaviour has a recurring pattern now.

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24 Mar 08 #17541 by dukey
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Hello Gp

Sorry to hear that gp i wonder how many marriages drink has ended such a shame.

Well the drinking staying out untill the early hours not looking after your son all count as UB if thats the road you choose, and if i were you i would consider getting costordy of your son for his health and safety.

Good luck Gp

dukey

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24 Mar 08 #17543 by gp126
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Indeed I would like to get custordy of my son, however from what I have read the courts do not normally favour the man in the relationship. What I am finding difficult is how this will all stand up in court/proceedings at the end of the day it is my word against hers, I cannot prove that she is out till all hours or indeed the state she is in when she gets home, if she comes home. This morning she rolled in at about 10am and said she was taking my son. I had to call the police as my sons home is here, and I didn't know where I stood legally on stopping her from taking him. I was not sure of her intentions i.e. whether she was going to drive etc. In the end the police breathalised her and she was borderline, so I agreed that she couldtake my son to her parents who live nearby (on foot). I plan to seek legal advice tomorrow, do you have any tips etc as to questions I should ask or how I should approach the meeting with the solicitor?

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24 Mar 08 #17546 by dukey
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Hi Gp

Take note of her actions times dates any police involvement it will all add wait to your case when at the family court.

Its best to right down the questions you will ask before you see the sol, the first half hour is usually free so book a few others and get some more advice and find a sol you get on with, make sure the sol you choose is an expert in family law and a member of resolve muupet i meant resolution.

dukey

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24 Mar 08 #17547 by gp126
Reply from gp126
Thanks for the advice Dukey!

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