A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

What do I do now..........

  • Bjc67
  • Bjc67's Avatar Posted by
  • Senior Member
  • Senior Member
13 Apr 12 #323529 by Bjc67
Topic started by Bjc67
My first post here and right now I am totally devastated. Not slept or eaten for 3 days now since my wife left. The manner in which she left was just so unexpected in that I go to work and she takes all her belongings out without me knowing. I came home to a half empty house.
It is a long story but briefly I met her just 15 months ago as a recovering alcoholic. Following a whirlwind romance we got married. We then moved away and as she was home alone all day relapsed and has basically been battling with alcohol addiction since.
I loved her unconditionally as she did have some dry spells and that seemed to be the only time I was not living with the jekyl & hyde. She was herself very loving towards me, or so I thought.
I have found out now that when she went into a rehab clinic last year (she walked after a couple of weeks)she met another girl in there who did complete the programme but has also now relapsed and my wife has been in contact. This girl has rather deviously persuaded her to leave me now and move her belongings there. (No idea where that is though)
Reason being my wife went back into rehab yet again the day after she left me.
She says that she doesnt want a life with me after she completes the rehab and wants to start a new life. After all I have done for her it really, really hurts.
If anyone has ever lived with an alcoholic you will understand just how hard it can be but I didnt care because I know its an illness and I cared about her. Since she has gone many people have said its the best thing she has done for me and I deserve better. Its easy to say that if you haven''t loved her like I did and it is no consolation right now as I really trusted and loved her no matter what. I cannot even contact her, she has total control in that respect now with a phone call if she chooses.
At the end of the day I am still married to her but what do I do ?
I am really struggling to cope, can’t function properly at all.

  • fedup70
  • fedup70's Avatar
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
13 Apr 12 #323536 by fedup70
Reply from fedup70
Hi, i too lived with an alcoholic for 9 years, yes it was bloody tuff, do everything for them and it still aint good enough, always haveing things thrown back in my face, eventually i asked him to leave, the weight which was lifted from my shouloders was enormous, it was the best thing i ever did, you will too see that life does go on and please believe me it will get better, try and eat a nd drink a little something. Alcoholics are selfish people no matter how much you love them them , Hope you feel better soon x Take one day at a time x

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11