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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


Let''s Get It Over With!

  • Palermo
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29 Apr 12 #327197 by Palermo
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hadenoughnow wrote:

It is the needs of the children - and the parent with care that come first in a situation like this.

If you are intending to remarry then you will be living in a 2 income household and she will have just one (plus CM, tax credits etc).

If she cannot afford to stay in the home then where can she afford to live?

Hadenoughnow


Maybe she should have thought about that before acting like a reject from the Jeremy Kyle show. I will never have sympathy for a mother that tells her own children she doesn''t love them.

I know how bad she is with finances. She can''t afford to live in the house, can''t afford not to.
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29 Apr 12 #327216 by hadenoughnow
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She could just be hurt and lashing out although clearly this is inappropriate.

Did you separate before or after you met your new wife to be? This may have some bearing on her behaviour.

If she is really not interested in the children, perhaps you should apply for residence? That way you may get a better financial split. It may though affect your plans for the future.
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29 Apr 12 #327218 by Palermo
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hadenoughnow wrote:

She could just be hurt and lashing out although clearly this is inappropriate.

Did you separate before or after you met your new wife to be? This may have some bearing on her behaviour.

If she is really not interested in the children, perhaps you should apply for residence? That way you may get a better financial split. It may though affect your plans for the future.


I haven''t met anyone yet. I said I plan on getting remarried asap and I can''t do that if I don''t have any money to start over again.

Seems I''ll get screwed over regardless. What exactly was the point in seeing a solicitor in the first place?
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29 Apr 12 #327220 by Shezi
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Palermo,

It may well be the case that you can''t stand your stbx but it isn''t her you''re expected to support. You''re expected to support her care of the children. She''s going to need a home in which to care for them. If she can''t afford to live at the house and she can''t afford not to, what''s going to happen to the children?

Not sure how planning to get married as soon as possible before you''ve met someone works, but I would take some time to take stock. At the end of the day, I''m assuming marriage to your wife was a choice for you? The last thing you need is to fall into a similar situation in another marriage.

Shezi
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29 Apr 12 #327222 by Palermo
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I''m nearly 40. I''ve been alone for 14 years. Why exactly do I need more time to take stock of things? I want the same thing many people want, to be happily married. I could do a much better job of looking after the children than she can, it would be hard not to. Given the choice my eldest son would want to live with me but I don''t want to split him up from his brother, I don''t want him to go through the bullying and abuse his brother went through when he was younger. The children are the innocent party in this, they shouldn''t suffer because of their mother and no the courts don''t have the children''s interests at heart, if they did I''d get custody. Ask either of my children which parent they would want to live with and they''ll give the same answer they gave when she pulled a similar stunt years ago.
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29 Apr 12 #327225 by Shezi
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So... they can''t live with you - she must provide a home for them.. you say she can''t afford to. What do you see happening?

Shezi
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29 Apr 12 #327227 by Palermo
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Shezi wrote:

So... they can''t live with you - she must provide a home for them.. you say she can''t afford to. What do you see happening?

Shezi


In order :

1. I end up homeless
2. The house gets repossessed within 12 months
3. The house is sold and I a paltry share at less than market value
4. In 2 years I graduate and leave the country
5. In 5 years I take custody of the kids
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