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  • Tracey1971
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06 May 12 #328815 by Tracey1971
Topic started by Tracey1971
Hiya everyone
Just wanna say hello to everyone as I am new to this and am in the early days of being told after 18 years marriage that he no longer wants to b together which feels like I''ve been stabbed in the heart and hope that joining this site might help me get through this:(

  • Lostboy67
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06 May 12 #328817 by Lostboy67
Reply from Lostboy67
Hi Tracy,
Welcome to wiki, glad you found us.
There are a lot of wikipeeps who either are or have been in exactly the same situation as you, me included.
I am a long way from the initial knife in the heart moment, but I remember all of the turmoil of emotions that took place.
Be assured it does get better, when it will for you I don''t know, every one deals with the situation differently.
For the moment focus on keeping yourself together as much as possible, remember to eat, sleep as well as possible (not easy I know).
The biggest thing to overcome is fear of the future, when you are feeling a little stronger look around the site and try to get an idea of what the future will look like, knowing this really does help.

Take care

  • stukadivebomber
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06 May 12 #328822 by stukadivebomber
Reply from stukadivebomber
Hi Tracy,

Welcome aboard:(

Yes, being on wiki does help.

Things tend to get ''less bad'' before they get better.
It happens very slowly.

Stick to as many routines as you can.
It''s the diet you never wanted!

  • Try, try again but failin
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06 May 12 #328826 by Try, try again but failin
Reply from Try, try again but failin
Hi Tracey

I just joined today, the support is great, the site is great too.

I have been here all a/noon, reading posts.

  • pixy
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06 May 12 #328828 by pixy
Reply from pixy
Welcome. None of us wanted to end up in this situation but we can all help each other to get through it. You are probably still in shock. When you feel a little better explore the site for advice, post your questions in the forum, use a blog as a diary or just to let off steam, pop into chat for some real life support.

In the meantime look after yourself - if you are finding it difficult to eat try soup, yogurt or bananas.

  • Canuck425
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07 May 12 #328835 by Canuck425
Reply from Canuck425
I think I typed out a message like this earlier in the day. So sad but the story is so common...

You need to remember that the leaver has had months or years to think this through. He is WAY ahead of you. Now you need to catch up fast. Your head is spinning and you cannot believe this is happening. I know.

You need to focus on you. Your interests. Only you. One way to approach it is that your marriage is over. That''s not to say you cannot build up a new and much better marriage if you both are willing to invest the time and energy. But the marriage you had is gone. Forever.

In these early days you need to focus on basic living. Eat well, sleep well, exercise, drink lots of water, stay away from drugs or alcohol, get support from real live people, find a therapist. Try to do little things for yourself. Be kind to yourself.

Take care!

  • Tracey1971
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07 May 12 #328856 by Tracey1971
Reply from Tracey1971
And thanks for all your messages and support. I am finding this site helpful and hope that it and the people on here can help me and maybe in the future when I am stronger I can offer help to others. My main problem is my husband won''t move out the house even though it''s him who wants out. I am in the process of trying to buy him out and once he has his money he will be gone I hope! Trying to carry on as normal but every day is a struggle just to function doing normal day to day tasks.,when he''s not around I feel I am better but as soon as he is home I am in bits
Anyway I am sure I will be posting on here more and maybe let people know my story in the future xx
Thanks again for making me feel so welcome :)

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