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Hi everyone

  • Rosiebud
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  • New Member
13 May 12 #330298 by Rosiebud
Topic started by Rosiebud
My husband is trying to get me to leave our privately rented home and insists I can take nothing with me but my clothes as he bought everything.

I am currently sleeping on the floor in a spare room with a throw for cover and am waiting for a hysterectomy so this is very distressing.

A good female friend has offered me the use of her spare room but why should I leave with nothing? All I want is my computer, some household goods, a TV and DVD player and my dogs!

Sorry for the moan :(

  • soobee
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  • Elite Member
13 May 12 #330300 by soobee
Reply from soobee
hi rosiebud
sorry to hear what ur going throu...why shud you move..cant he....having been throu the same op as you ..i will say you need to put urself 1ST its not an easy thing to go throu...hopefully someone will be able to give you more advice on what to do......big hug

  • flowerofscotland
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13 May 12 #330302 by flowerofscotland
Reply from flowerofscotland
Hi Rosiebud,

Hello and welcome to Wiki. You will find bags full of information and support here as and when you need it.

Firstly, take good care of yourself, you must considering the major surgery you are about to undergo.

Secondly, you have not elaborated on your domestic situation and why you find yourself in this state. Although the home is privately rented, I take it the rent and bills are being paid jointly? Also, I take it that you are separating which will ultimately lead to divorce? Are there any grounds for this e.g. does he have someone in the wings ready to move into your home and your life?

I have concerns that you are sleeping on a floor in your own home with just a throw, surely even in today''s world, that seems a bit callous to say the least. Is he bullying you? Because if he is, then do not move, you have as much entitlement to be in the marital home (rented or not) as he has until all the legalities are formalised. Most Wiki''s will encourage you not to leave until you know where you stand. Do not let him pull the wool over your eyes!

Do you also have a close friend or family member who can help you after your operation? Just be careful whilst you are in hospital that he does not get up to any dirty tricks, whilst the cats away the mice will play!

Keep us posted and if you can give us more details the legally minded I am sure will be along to give you the heads up!

Take care for now FoS x

  • Mitchum
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  • Moderator
13 May 12 #330310 by Mitchum
Reply from Mitchum
Rosebud, I''m shocked that anyone could be so callous as to make you sleep on the floor at all, but with your surgery pending it''s cruel.

So whatever the reasons the relationship has broken down, you are entitled to some decency. It seems you''re not likely to get it there, so I think you should consider going somewhere comfortable where you can prepare for your op.

Legally you may be advised to remain and I''m sure others will advise on that but I am concerned about your health and wellbeing at such a critical time.

After taking advice you would be better placed to make such a decision. Do call the helpline and discuss your options. The number is at the top of the home page.

Very sorry you''re in this situation but hopefully soon you''ll be somewhere where you can relax and concentrate on your welfare. xx

  • downland
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13 May 12 #330321 by downland
Reply from downland
Hi Rosebud, whatever the legalities of staying or going you have to look after yourself. I am 18 months into ''staying'' because I am a stubborn old witch. Even with that attitude it is hard both physically and mentally when the other person is self centred and doesnt give a monkeys ..... live in 6 bed house and pay half bills, run the business and live out of three quarters of a bedroom (which I also use as office). Stubborn old witch, but a relatively healthy stubborn old witch! Listen to all the advice but decide for YOURSELF and only YOURSELF (unless there are children - enough said).

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