Came across some jokes that made me laugh, thought I would share... please feel free to add some more.
(No offence intended)
What is the difference between a mediator and a doctor? A doctor can kill his patients
Lawyers are safe from the threat of automation taking over their professions. No one would build a robot to do nothing.
Q: What''s the difference between a porcupine and two lawyers in a Porsche?
A: The porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
The woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed way too qualified for the job.
"Look Miss," said the foreman, "have you any actual experience in picking lemons?"
"Well... as a matter if fact, Yes!" she replied. "I''ve been divorced three times."
Divorce has become so common that my wife and I are staying married just to be different.
"Instead of getting married again, I''m going to find a woman I don''t like and just give her a house."
What should you do if you see your "ex" rolling around, in pain, on the ground?
Shoot him again.
"Our parents got divorced when we were kids and it was kind of cool. We got to go to divorce court with them. It was like a game show. My mom won the house and car. We''re all excited. My dad got some luggage."