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What lessons have you learned

  • gettingadjusted
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18 Mar 10 #192672 by gettingadjusted
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Elle wrote:

hawaythelads wrote:

And a one and a two and a one two three four


Dancing lessons for the first waltz :unsure:;):laugh:need I look out my hat?

E


I reckon this is all a freudian slip by haway it keeps saying dont get married but then this year was wanting to know what best to get valentie presents.

Haway just think if you get enough goods on the wedding list you could then pawn them to help fund the harridan and bazza have a life charity

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18 Mar 10 #192714 by musicmad
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The other thing I have learned? Letting anger and bitterness drown you is not the way to go.

I'm sorry if my last post offended anyone. I do feel that the "system" is incredibly biased towards mother's "rights" (as opposed to treating people as equal parents) and it does really eat at me.

However I do accept that ranting like a nutter is not pleasant and certainly not called for.

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18 Mar 10 #192715 by ldg
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musicmad wrote:

The other thing I have learned? Letting anger and bitterness drown you is not the way to go.

I'm sorry if my last post offended anyone. I do feel that the "system" is incredibly biased towards mother's "rights" (as opposed to treating people as equal parents) and it does really eat at me.

However I do accept that ranting like a nutter is not pleasant and certainly not called for.


Personally I don't think it was offensive in the least MM. I think it is good to let off steam here when you are amongst people who understand. Actually after I read your post this morning, I was thinking a lot about what you had said and the injustice of it all. It doesn't help you but not all women are like your ex, most of us are nice, caring and fair....with a consience.

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18 Mar 10 #192717 by Elle
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musicmad wrote:

The other thing I have learned? Letting anger and bitterness drown you is not the way to go.

I'm sorry if my last post offended anyone. I do feel that the "system" is incredibly biased towards mother's "rights" (as opposed to treating people as equal parents) and it does really eat at me.

However I do accept that ranting like a nutter is not pleasant and certainly not called for.


Hey MM,

Letting go is not easy and ranting here is great cos the feedback gives great food for thought that may not be nice to hear but can be helpful.

Many feel the legal system is unfair and a fewer number have experienced extreme unfairness.

I agree with you that the "system" is biased towards women, as this was not so in my case this has exacerbated my plight in many ways and clouded/biased my views. In addition, five years ago (19th March 2005) I was left a beaten mess and I was by then near five years into divorce and alienation from our kids. Another lesson I learned....

"It" happened, feck all I can do to change that...but I can change how I cope with it.

E

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19 Mar 10 #192738 by hawaythelads
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Elle
You are the honorary bloke ;)
"DON'T GET MARRIED"
Then when a relationship ends that's it.No financial bollocks to sort out!!Or dealing with someone who each party percieves to be the devil incarnate!!!
DO NOT GET MARRIED !!!!!!

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19 Mar 10 #192743 by Elle
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I must be missing angels instead? Make ur mind up BA ya wiki tart...hats are waso for me ;)

E

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19 Mar 10 #192758 by musicmad
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Elle/ldg - thanks for your replies...

I think in a nutshell that there are many cases where people who do nothing and get everything...

I was less than perfect I admit (often very stressed) but I did far more than "my share" in the relationship. My wife was a housewife (whatever that means) and although she could lie in bed past midday half the time, she didn't even iron me one shirt, or make one lunch in all the years we were together although I have been told that she "supported my career".

The feeling that hurts the most is that I have being taken for such a fool - 17yrs of very hard graft all supplied directly to her for 5yrs of (mostly miserable) marriage - now 7yrs as I have spent 2yrs saying "no" to allowing her to sponge off me until I die. I couldn't hate myself more for making that signature at the hotel.

I've also learnt that I will leave this miserable country - 25% of children now in single parent families. Splits, living off the state being actively encouraged. Children having children and being supported for doing so. 30% of children from broken homes never knowing their father. It's Absolute madness - something that the current divorce laws openly support.

Elle - you used the word "feck" - I thought that was copyright HTL? This could be a dangerous combination you know...

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