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Nearly there

  • itsbeenalongtime
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2 years 9 months ago #499311 by itsbeenalongtime
Nearly there was created by itsbeenalongtime
Well nearly over the final hurdle. just waiting for the last few signatures and the last few forms.
The more time that passes the more I realise that I can and will be happy.
My ex is telling everyone that I got the lot!
He couldnt be more right !!!!!!!!!!
I have the love and support of my amazing children, friends and family. As this is priceless to me I will always have got more out of this divorce than he did. Well he wanted it, he got it.
I also got the house, land and 53% of the pension.
Many times through the whole process I felt I should have taken my ex`s first offer as every offer was reducing as fast as the bank balance.
My ex lied throughout the whole process and I think this upset me more than anything. The fact that he was able to control the process of the court and was never called to order was very upsetting. My barrister said its not worth the time and effort and the judge could see through the lies. Well it would have been worth it for me!
Anyway I felt that as long as I was honest and truthful I had nothing to lose.
I was lucky in the sense that we had far more money than I ever knew. We lived a very frugal life due to the fact that my ex was as tight as a yaks backside.
End result I end up with house,land and 53% of pension which was 3x his original offer. It is a little over 50% but his ability to continue earning 70k+ against my 6k balances the little extra out.
Stay true to yourself as you have to be able to keep your heads high.
Best of luck to those not yet at the end of this awful roller coaster ride.
XX

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  • WYSPECIAL
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2 years 9 months ago #499322 by WYSPECIAL
Replied by WYSPECIAL on topic Re:Nearly there
Congratulations on getting to this stage of your journey.

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  • Bubblegum11
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2 years 9 months ago #499327 by Bubblegum11
Replied by Bubblegum11 on topic Re:Nearly there
Oh wow! Good on you for holding out. It’s a long road but for you the end is certainly near. It feels great to get that closure but also strange to wake up the next day without all the stress and uncertainty to deal with, when it’s become such a normal expectation for everyday.

All the best of luck in the next chapter in your life! :-)

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  • itsbeenalongtime
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2 years 9 months ago #499340 by itsbeenalongtime
Replied by itsbeenalongtime on topic Re:Nearly there
Thank you guys,
You are so right Bubblegum11, you do end up wondering what to be worried about.
The art of opening an email without that awful rush of panic coursing through your body. Almost enjoying the postman stopping for a chat because you are smiling today.
Well full swing into kitchen and garden planning.
looking forward to the first summer in 6 years doing what \"I\" want to do.
Love to you all. xx

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2 years 9 months ago #499377 by Lymm
Replied by Lymm on topic Re:Nearly there
So so pleased for you, I wish I had been as brave as you. I ended up settling for far less than I probably could but I couldn't take the emails threatening to take everything anymore.
Even his solicitor at one point said are you sure. I just got to the point were my health was suffering and I couldn't cope anymore.
But two years later I'm have my own home and I have my children, the house may be small and not where I would rather live but it's all ours and we will never lose our home again.
I too am looking forward to spending time in my garden and just enjoying a much simpler life.
Good luck to you my friend

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  • Mitchum
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2 years 9 months ago #499379 by Mitchum
Replied by Mitchum on topic Re:Nearly there
This is such good news and I'm delighted for you. It's been a very long and distressing journey for and now you can enjoy the freedom and peace. I love your comments about getting the lot with your lovely children, family and friends!!!! Such wealth cannot be assessed!

Wishing you much happiness. xx

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  • itsbeenalongtime
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2 years 9 months ago #499397 by itsbeenalongtime
Replied by itsbeenalongtime on topic Re:Nearly there
SO pleased you are now able to move on Lymm. I was lucky that my ex had sighted he couldn`t give his address, as due to my harassment he had been forced to move, totally untrue. But I was able to forward to my solicitor some of his threatening emails and he was forced to stop.
I would have given in long before but my children knew him too well, even promising to keep me for ever if it went horribly wrong, now that could have gone horribly wrong. :) love them to bits but living with them forever :(.
I start my bathroom makeover today. Trying to remove his stamp from my lovely house. If I could have got a similar house in the area for the same money moving would have been easier. Every cupboard, draw, shelf,etc, still has him on it or in it. But he will be out by the time my makeover is complete.
Best of luck for the future. Chin up and keep chatting. xxx

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