A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

Up and down

  • Hatton1
  • Hatton1's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
30 Jun 19 #508333 by Hatton1
Reply from Hatton1
You're right it is pointless looking for reasons, but it's also very natural so forgive yourself the odd lapse.

Honestly you sound as you're doing pretty well only 4 months in. I was still weeping on the floor at that stage !! The people on here were amazing, and although you don't wish misery on someone else it's a real help to hear how many others have been through this horrible process and not only survived but thrived too. I'm 2.5 yrs down the line and my life is not perfect, but I'm happy now in a way I wouldn't have thought possible at the time.

I think one of the best pieces of advice I was given here was when I posted something like 'why does this still hurt so much ?' And the reply was because I allowed it too. It takes time but you do eventually realise only you are now responsible for how you feel, and you start to take control again. Learn to appreciate you and look after yourself again. Be brave, get yourself out of your comfort zone and hopefully make new friends. It's so hard when your life has been shaken so badly but only you can make the difference.

Loneliness is a killer to start with (especially in the evenings) but again I think you learn to find the positives. I'll never have to watch hours of motorsports again !! It's tough to quieten the whirring in your head at night, I still don't sleep brilliantly, but someone on here suggested listening to podcasts with headphones while you try to fall asleep and that really helped me.

You are doing great, but they don't call this a rollercoaster for nothing.

  • jenson
  • jenson's Avatar
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
21 Jul 19 #508638 by jenson
Reply from jenson
it's all too early for you, all will be ok, I have just got my absolute and Consent Order,even after the absolute I have good and bad moments and I was seperated two years.

Just keep busy surround yourself who care for you and just look after yourself.

You have to be strong and positive as you still have the whole thing to go through.

  • JDM1982
  • JDM1982's Avatar Posted by
  • Junior Member
  • Junior Member
21 Jul 19 #508639 by JDM1982
Reply from JDM1982
Cheers jenson. I appreciate the reply.
I’m just taking each day as it comes and trying to improve myself.

Thanks and take care

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11