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  • Mrs Ingledew
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19 Feb 08 #14356 by Mrs Ingledew
Topic started by Mrs Ingledew
I am still going through the last part of my divorce.

Most days I do not think of my ex and if I do it is rarely with any emotion - other than I wish he would get his finger out! but then I do still think of her and with disgust - again infrequently.

And I feel it its time to move on. Now I never spent much time on the dating scene in the first place - I married my second boyfriend!! (fool!!)

However I have met a new man and I am finding it hard to trust him or is it to trust myself?

My new man has told me masses about his past relationships, slip ups etc. including bits he is not proud of.

How much should I expect to be told? I am trying hard not to dig deeper - when my stbx had his affair I found out via his email, pc and mobile. My new guy admits to having used adult contact sites as well as dating agencies (think I know the difference)and more wordly than me.

He says he doesn't want to look for anyone every again and that he wants to commit to me and marry me! (scary!!)

His friends also say the same about him.

My children think he is "awesome" and he gets on well with them.

But and there is a but I am terrified that he will lie to me and that this is a game to him. I have asked (ish) and have had the response that if I can't rust him there will be no future - but that he will wait.

How do I sort my head out?

  • phoenix1
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19 Feb 08 #14363 by phoenix1
Reply from phoenix1
Very difficult one this, and each person will deal with it in a different way.Everyone can give you advise but it is how YOU feel about him that matters.

Would I trust someone 100% ever again? Simple answer is NO. I think when you have loved someone so much and they have cheated on you, How can you?

The trust will build over time I agree, but never to 100%.

If he makes you happy and brings a smile to your face,excellent enjoy it while it is there but don't jump in with both feet.

One day at a time !

  • gone1
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19 Feb 08 #14398 by gone1
Reply from gone1
Taylr14. This is just me. So take with a pinch. You dont need to be as paranoid as I am.

If I ever meet anyone I reserve the right to be able to go anywhere, be that phone, email or friends or what ever for information about that person. That person will have to know that I have trust issues. Provided that I can do that then I will feel happier. And I would keep an eye on that person. Not just now but always. Never have a PIN on the phone and I can look at the phone bill or what ever. I am not sure if you want to do this level of checking. But once bitten twice shy. I cant see anything wrong in snooping on someone. Not now. Not after what happened. Chris.

  • chillygirl
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19 Feb 08 #14419 by chillygirl
Reply from chillygirl
I could never trust a guy again fully.

I think, once you have been s**t on, you will find it hard to put your heart out fully, just incase it gets destroyed again.

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