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Day in Bristol

  • yellowrose
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11 Apr 12 #323103 by yellowrose
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YOu know what the most significant thing about your feelings of insignificance is - that you are not alone. So many of us have been there and for my part am there still. It doesn''t take away the pain or bewilderment. It doesn''t lessen the panic or isolation. It doesn''t even make you see that in the end you will be O.K. But it does give you hope that in time you will be like all the people who have gone down the road of recovery.
I won''t tell you how long since my frist day alone, but I will tell you that the pain will last much longer than you thought possible. Just when you though you might be making progress something will jump up and bite you and you will go crashing back down.
However.........
In time the hurt does get less and less, you will start to smile and eventually you will find yourself re-entering a world that is worth being in.
Don''t despair. Cry when you want to. Accept all invitations (you won''t want to), tell people how you feel. Let them see you cry. Remember to thank them when they have been good enough to listen to your outpourings and above all tell yourself this is not about you. This is about her.
I still need to be told I will be O.K and I still need my friends invaluable support. There is no quick fix - hard when like me you''re used to ''fixing'' things - but try and be kind to yourself, eat well (not like me who lost 4 stone!!) and allow yourself to feel.
My heart goes out to you and I really wish you the very best in the future. YR

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11 Apr 12 #323105 by mez
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(((Samchik))) It is normal to feel hollow & lost. It is very early days for you and me saying it WIll get less and easier won''t make you feel better.
All you can do is listen to the wikis on here and they will have lots of support for you.
A couple of things that helped me keep putting one foot in front of the other when all I wanted to do was turn the clock back:

1. Put audio cd''s in the car & onto your mp3, talking books & comedy. You won''t want to laugh but it removes the ''mood music''.
2. Keep a book & a pair of sunnies handy for when you want to sit in the park & cry.

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11 Apr 12 #323112 by perin123
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Small steps Samchick, if that''s all you can manage at the moment, just small steps.

It is such an awful situation to be in, I think everyone on here will agree. But you have to think about yourself and your child at least for now.

There is so much support and advice on here, you can post or go into chat to pick you up anytime.

xx

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