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Why?

  • hattiedaw
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23 Jul 12 #344844 by hattiedaw
Topic started by hattiedaw
I am sick of seeing my friend in pain, worried to death.
Her ex left her and the kids for someone else 5 years ago.
He has lived his new life (cancelling contact in favour of holidays with new family, nights out with new Mrs, meals with new in-laws etc), had a couple more kids etc.
My friend has always facilitated contact at his request.
What I want to know is why this evil couple still insist years down the line on torturing my friend???
He had an affair and left.
This resulted in the loss of the family home.
My friend was left fending for herself and her babies in a rented house a quarter of the size of the former home with no child maintenance (self employed, cooks the books very well!).
She is such a happy person, tries not to see the bad in anyone, will help anyone out etc and yet this awful couple do nothing but put her down and make her life a misery.
She''s fat and ugly (she isnt)
She''s a terrible mum (she isn''t)
She doesnt clean the house (if anything she is OCD about cleaning)
She doesnt read to the kids (both are on the SEN register at school but my friend DOES constantly read to the kids, the SEN aspect came about when Dad left)
..and the list goes on.
They brag about their life, holidays, fab house, brightness of other kids etc. My friend doesnt want to hear this when he gets away with paying no maintenance!
Why cant they just leave her alone? It makes my blood boil.
The latest is that she''s been told her ex and OW are no relocating nearer to her so that they can have 50/50 shared care (my ex has been full time parent to them for 5 years with very intermittent contact). She thinks this has co-incided with a lucrative job offer ex has had and will be a way to not have to pay through CSA.
It''s just not fair how some people are with others who were the victims!
Rant over.
Sorry.

  • sun flower
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23 Jul 12 #344937 by sun flower
Reply from sun flower
I feel for your friend too.

  • freefalling
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24 Jul 12 #344999 by freefalling
Reply from freefalling
Hi Hattledaw,

Why? That''s the $64,000 question!! You or your friend may never get the answer to that. Some people make it their life''s mission just to cause other people anguish, pain and sorrow.

My heart goes out to your friend who obviously doesn''t deserve the treatment she is getting and I hope that one day soon what these selfish low lives sow, catches up to them.

I wish you both well.

  • revenge
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24 Jul 12 #345012 by revenge
Reply from revenge
Your friend needs to look in the mirror and find the woman she used to be. If she takes a long hard look at herself she will see the woman who is strong enough to look at the children on her own, look after the house on her own, and see if she smiles at herself she will realise she is not ugly, just unhappy. I was talking about having a face lift for about 2years b4 my husband left he said if you want one get it done, my brother and family said you don''t need one, you just need to smile more. I realise the ugliness i thought was there was actually about how I was feeling rather then how I was looking.
She will realise that how she is feeling is how he has made her feel. My husband said I was negative, couldn''t make choices etc, funny how my family and neighbours have all said my strengths lie in putting things together. When I look back now I see how negative, ugly and unhappy he made me feel and all because he had his eyes on ow everyday.
Thank god ive ad support since he left and people have told me how good I look. Just keep letting her know her good points because they are what counts.

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