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The "Other Woman"

  • taff45
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13 Aug 12 #349102 by taff45
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Hi everyone

Was hoping for some advice on how to cope with jealousy and suspicion. I now know there is woman who is involved with my husband, he however claims adamantly its just a friendship. I cant get him to budge on this. She is all over his Facebook page and he on hers. I keep searching Facebook as a result. Also keep searching pockets etc for evidence. I have found enough to know it may not be a physical relationship - which he claims if i believe him - but its definitely and emotional relationship.

The logical part of me tells me this is not good for me and to stop. But I am desperate for final conformation of exactly whats going on and can`t. I know it would be better for me just to let go and move forward. Accept it and say its happened / happening there is nothing I can do and let go. But I just can`t seem to make myself do this. Its eating away at me. Had managed to cope a bit better with the relationship break up until this other woman became a reality. I have gone backwards again as a result. Finding it difficult to function and cope again - not that I was doing this really well before her but at least I was starting to accept and move forward.

This has turned into a bit of a ramble but I would really appreciate any advice from those who have been there or are in the same situation.

  • Boo2u21964
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13 Aug 12 #349105 by Boo2u21964
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As you work your way through this nightmare, you will swing back and forwards! Something will come up and you will feel you are right back where you started, keep posting and look back and read, you will realise that actually you are not!Don''t be too hard on yourself for feeling the way you do,its one of the worse places in the world to be! I wouldn''t wish it on my worst!!!Your doing great just by actually knowing what you SHOULD be doing!!
Its a slow hog but little by little you get along,there''s almost ALWAYS another woman!!and in the beginning they are in that HONEYMOON period and NOTHING you can say or do will change what will happen. I had to give myself a right telling off and say DONT YOU DARE let him see you struggling!!Get out and spend time with family and friends, that helped me gain strenght to move on!
Im rambling now! :)Hope you get what I mean x

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13 Aug 12 #349111 by taff45
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Yes I do get what you mean, that helps a lot.

Everything goes around and around in my head and sometimes it feels like I am going crazy with it all. People like you help me cling on and keep going. Thanksx

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13 Aug 12 #349113 by Boo2u21964
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Im three years into it (he left,married a woman he had know for 6 months and is regretting it already in that time)....and there,s not a day that it doesn''t go through my head, but it hurts less and I can manage to think of something else.My whole world was changed in the wink of an eye,I will NEVER understand why so its only natural to constantly wonder what happened, But I just say....
HE wanted it to happen
HE didnt thing how it would effect this children
HE didnt give a damn about my feelings!
He wasnt the man I thought he was,it was a selfish act! so
do I want to waste my thoughts on him??NO!!! :)

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