I found wiki in Oct 2008 when id just split from second ex wife. Literally saved my life because i was in the darkest place i had ever been. The support from the people was overwhelming, and still is to this day.
From both legal and emotional sides wiki has been there and id have no hesitation in recommending the site to anyone in need.
Guess im classed as a 'long term user' and the reason i stayed on was that i thought it about time to give something back to the community, to help others. Having been divorced twice i have that experience im afraid so i can provide support and totally understand the pain and destruction it causes.
Having a very 'daft' and 'warped' sense of humour i 'try' to pull people out of that mindset where everything is doom n gloom, and in a good number of cases it works which i think is a good thing! Certainly made many friends over the years. Some moved on, some still here.
Never used the legal support services but my case wasnt straight forward and if i knew what i do now (legal knowledge) i would of saved thousands in sols fees.
On a personal level wiki encouraged me to study family law as a hobbie and its something i find rewarding because i can support a litle further. You could say in some ways helping others is helping me.
a) wiki has helped me enormously. When I first joined I kind of knew who was who, and we used to have a 'surgery' with a barrister
. I found that invaluable at the time, as she gave me the courage to stick a rocket up my sols bum. I found out only recently that my sol was newly qualified and she has enjoyed working with me as it encouraged her to fight. I believe that that was down to the amazing person that gave up her time and helped with FREE advise, else I'm sure I would have been shafted.
I apprieciate that others has filled her shoes on here but I am unsure of who does what.
b) I have recommended Wiki to close friends and collegues (not too many as I wouldn't want the x to get wind of sources).
c) I am still not Absolute, although I have been to FH. I peek in occasionally to see if I can gather any snippets to help my case. Or to help (I hope) other wiki's.
d) I enjoy coming onto Wiki. I am still very cagy and although I would love to come to a 'meet' and personally thank all those that have helped me, but at present I am still very nervous of bumping into someone I know. I have struggled with the new chat (not so new now!) it's way too quick for me now. And sometimes it just makes my day reading some of the comments from Haway.
e) defo!! as stated above. If it hadn't been for DL advising me when I went to MPS I'm sure I would be homeless right now! And between her and a personal friend getting me in a fighting mindset of not always accepting what my sol advises.
I didn't realise until DL told me that my sol has to fight for me but also protect herself, so she advises and I reject her advise then if we loose then I cannot have a go at her. Each time I have pushed her we have won buthad it not been for the advise on here I would've simply accepted my sol's word.
f) I have used the Actuary quick service. I was having problem's convincing my sol that my x's pension was worth lots more. He submitted 50k ish. The actuary did an express service within 48 hours that showed it was worth so so so much more. We then took that report to the court and the Judge ordered a full actuarial report, unfortunatley x wouldn't allow me to come back to yourselves, we had to jointly instruct. The pension turned out to be slightly less than the express service but still turned out to be nearly £400k!! An invaluable tool for me as had I not had the report we would proberly have gone into court with a £50k cetv!
So!!! keep up the good work!! You have so far proved invaluable to me.
I do not think I would have got through the past year without the support I have got from this site. I value the legal and financial advice that I have got as well as the emotional support. The first wikimeet I went to provided a lifeline that I desperately needed.
Over and above this what has been really interesting and useful to me is discovering that I am not the only person in a very long marriage who is facing divorce and that the trajectory of responses from an adulterous partner is such a standard pattern.
Cross fingers my stbx and I are at last heading for an amicable settlement. If so, I am intending to use an online wiki servie for writing up the
To be quite honest without wiki I would certainly be locked up in a lunatic asylum by now and seriously dread to think what damage I would have inflicted on unsuspecting members of the public who happened to get in my way during some of my worst moments in dealing with my unbelievable ex. (Aargh he is STILL my stbx!!)
I could not have managed without the advice and support of wiki members both those with actual knowledge and those with just hugs and not forgetting those that make me laugh! Wiki has been and still is invaluable as this nightmare continues.
I have also met some fantastic people - some just virtually and some in person and now have a whole new group of friends.
And best of all I found the love of my life here!! so yes I would wholeheartedly recommend wiki to anyone.