Well, don't know how to start this, so bear with with me please..
Wife (or STBEx !!) and I together in same house at the moment. Not fun.! House is rented, comes with her job. She is in the forces and main breadwinner,about 32K. I work part time (35 hours) earn about 14 and a half K. We have 2 children 13 and 10. I left full time employment just before youngest was born, to raise the children and be a house-dad. Returned to part work when youngest started school. My work has always been school based. So always fitted around the kids needs.
Marriage has been rocky for a number of years for various reasons, though recently she has a new friend, bloke-much younger... and spends most of her time on the internet in the bedroom. Long story. So, we have decided to separate.
I have said that I will leave. I think it will be easier for the boys, friends, 'home' etc.I'm pretty sure the only reason she is willing to have kids is so she can keep the house. Currently flat hunting locally. Don't want to leave the boys, but I feel that it will be better for them to have some familiarity in their routine. And if I stay... It will create more upset for them. Damned.... either way. Wife could move out, but that would mean the loss of the family house. But apparently there are ways around this. But she is totally unwilling to consider her leaving. Been told in no uncertain terms..
We have some debt. I have said that i will clear cc's (in her name!!) about5k. She doesn't want to sell the car, so has said she will keep it and take on loan. have suggested selling car, but again she is unwilling to discuss the possibility. Loan is in joint names, so pretty sure I could get screwed later on..
She just wants rid of me, wants a Clean Break
, but arguments start as soon as I ask to talk about the practical things, visiting the kids, custody, sorting out money, maintenance, benefits..etc mediation
sounds good, but the response is liable to 'explicit'.
She said i'll have survive on my wage, which I can do (just)..or get another job. Would I have to? I love my job. A friend mentioned spousal maintenance, something I know little about, Daren't suggest that. But if the roles were reversed..! Anyone got any thoughts.?
Don't want to get solicitors involved. Can't afford it.
Gonna sign off now.
Thanks in advance for reading my 'moan' or advice given.