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'Unreasonable behaviour' costs more?

  • divwiki
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06 Sep 07 #2939 by divwiki
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Just a thought: I wonder if it might be something to do with having to provide more examples of unreasonable behaviour? Adultery is a single charge whereas there are very few cases of a single charge of unreasonableness.

providing more examples must provide greater opportunities to challenge, however inadvisable that is.

For example, my delightful spouse is apparently about to claim I watch too much tv, didn't help around the house, was moody and mean with money. The first is subjective, the second is a lie because I did more than her (she is disabled), the third fails to reflect that I was suffering with depression and the last is demonstrably untrue. Do I let them all go? and if I challenge some, for pride more than anything, does it risk the suit failing?

Anyway enough about my problems, just thought it might reflect on your case!;)

  • gone1
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06 Sep 07 #2951 by gone1
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Hi Divwiki. No dont challange any of them. If you do you will have to pay costs. Just suck it up mate. THere is no magic to UB. There only has to be 1 reason. But most have a few and dont have to be major. Watching the telly being tight with money are small bear realy. In the old days this would have never washed. This was before no blame divorce. I suspect that as long as there are words in the reasons section then that will do.

If you challange the pettion then it will cost you big time and the divorce will still happen. It just delays matters and costs you more. Not worth it.

I made mine up. She didnt know what to put as she couldnt find anything wrong. Becuase I didnt do anything wrong. So they were all opposits.

I never did any decorating - She lived in a palace that was a show home. I hated it BTW.

I came home late - I was always in on time.

I would spend time staying in hotels at weekends - I was always home at weekends painting, tiling etc her palace.

I never spent any money on her or the kids - I never forgot a bithday or aniversary and I spent all that I could afford on them.

They are silly reasons realy even if they were true. I think I should have been an utter bastard and done the bad things. If I had I would have had a great time in those hotels living on great food and wine and having a fantastic time.

I would not have been decorating every weekend for about 7 years.

I have just built a wonderful home for her nasty children and her fat boyfriend. I hope he electrocutes himself in the downstairs shower that I paid for and installed during autum 2005.

It would have made no difference. At least I would not have needed to make the reasons up. Chris.

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06 Sep 07 #2954 by Skyler
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People, I have heard, have "made up" people they are supposed to have committed adultery with, since you dont have to put a named correspondent on the forms. The only problem with UB is that future partners might want to know what the grounds for your divorce were and judge you overly harshly--although not decorating and watching too much tv are probably not so likely to send someone running for the hills! Best of luck.

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06 Sep 07 #2956 by gone1
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But the reasons for UB are not public knowledge. Same with adultary. If that person is so interested then they can just ask. I know why my partner divorced and my partner are divorcing. Most people take you on face value. If you quack like and duck and waddle like duck............. Chris.

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06 Sep 07 #2958 by Skyler
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Maybe not available in public domain, but certainly the papers and grounds for divorce have to get viewed when you remarry, eg. Wouldn't want to have any many surprises in there is all..!

  • JLGsDad
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06 Sep 07 #2966 by JLGsDad
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Skyler, my wife was divorced and no-one told me anything about the grounds when I got married. She told me some things about her ex-husband, but now it's clear that she was lying to me in the same way that she lies about me now (I called her on her mobile once as she drank with friends, and by mistake she pressed the 'answer' button not the 'phone off' button; I then listened to some amazing lies about me before I rang off in disgust).

Mind you, it would have been all a bit late for me as she was 3 mths pregnant at the time.:ohmy:

Another thing I've learnt is that people can tell the most amazing lies to make themselves look good, so be sceptical of personal stories here - not everyone is as honest as you and me ;)

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06 Sep 07 #2968 by Skyler
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Argh! that's horrible, I think these people are like heat seeking missiles targetting us unsuspecting types! I was just remembering when we got married that H had to show decree (with the grounds on it) to the registrar to prove he was divorced, I knew what was in it because no big secret, but I guess there are ways to just conceal or palm all that if you are clever and manipulative and have something to hide. :sick:All the best to you. Skyler.

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