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CSA and paying the mortgage

  • davey123
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04 May 12 #328424 by davey123
Topic started by davey123

My wife asked me to leave 8 weeks ago for space and ive stayed with my parents since to give it. She has now decided she wants divorce and doesn''t feel the same way.

She won''t talk and doesn''t want mediation.

I need to find somewhere to live but am still paying mortgage and all bills at the family home and cannot afford it. I earn well but this takes the majority of my net.

Can anyone advise me on what i should pay re Joint mortgage and Child support??

I want her back but thats not possible.

Thanks in advance

  • somuch2know2
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04 May 12 #328427 by somuch2know2
Reply from somuch2know2
Okay.. STOP
You sound like me 8 months ago.

First- find out from the CSA how much yuo should be paying.

Second- Stop all joint bank accounts, joint CC- and make her set up her own DD for all household bills AND mortgage

Third- Pay the required amount for CSA to her account and tell her she needs to pay the mortgage the bills etc.

Do not be a shmuck like me and go into debt thinking you are doing ''right''.. all you will do is go into debt and be no better off.

  • Deedum
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04 May 12 #328436 by Deedum
Reply from Deedum
In my opinion you should be paying half the mortgage until you come to a financial agreement if it is in joint names and the child support at the level recommended by CSA.

  • somuch2know2
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04 May 12 #328440 by somuch2know2
Reply from somuch2know2
Im curious to why you think that?
He needs a place of his own... his mum''s sofa is not that! In order to do that he needs to pay rent, and buy items for his place.

She is living in the house, she should pay the mortgage and the bills.

Why should he be made to suffer for her decisions? He didnt ask for this. She clearly wasnt thinking of the children when she chucked him out. Or did she just want the life she had, without him, but on his bill?

Legally- and correct me if I am wrong- he is ONLY obligated to pay CSA, until there is a court order awarding anything further...

Being nice and paying over the odds gets you nothing but negative numbers in your bank account- Trust me, I know this first hand.

  • Bobbinalong
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04 May 12 #328441 by Bobbinalong
Reply from Bobbinalong
davey, a couple of answers so far, slightly different opinions, depends on your situation and how thats going to be in the months to come.
Your wife has succeeded in getting you out the house, you can probably bet on not a lot else happening now.
You will have your own bills to pay ultimately.
For now with one child you should pay 15% of your net pay, thats after pension too.
It would be fair to pay half the mortgage, although your not entirley liable for it, she is renting your bit of house now and yes it may affect your credit rating in the long run if the wotsit hit the fan. But you can only be ordered to pay by a court, if it feels it necessary.
As said you need to sort the bank accounts and bills. She will be getting the hild tax credits and benefits, money form you and if she is not working income support of whatever they call it now and no council tax or very little.
We have all been through this bit and its not easy. Blokes go from paying nothing to paying everything, it varies and depends on your situation.
When I was signing up to rent a place I beged my ex to tell me how much she would get as I was worried she wouldnt be able to pay her way, but she was quite ok with about a £1K a month for doing nothing.

But as said, dont think because your doing right it will always benefit you, it doesnt, she doesnt give a toss about you anymore.

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