I too would be interested to hear of anyone's experiences re private detectives...
I have a similar situation, in that, I tend to think (for a number of reasons) that my x2b is living with his new lady (I use that term extremely loosely) but I think he will 'deny' this when it comes to sorting our finances... re sale of house/future living arrangements etc... and it may be necessary to 'employ' such a service to prove that he does infact live with this person...
I suppose a few questions might be :
How much do they charge? (I know - how long is a piece of string?)
What services do they offer?
What 'proof' do they provide?
Do their findings stand up in court?
I HOPE this turns out to be a route that I don't have to go down... but the way things are going it might be the only way, as I have yet to hear a word of truth come from my x2b's mouth...
Thanks for taking the time to read.... any advice for myself and the above poster (sorry, forgetten the name) would be much appreciated
Karen, no experience here, but just to warn you. You could spend a lot of money, and by the time it comes to court, he could (temporarilly) move out, and claim she dumped him! If he's bought with a new partner (?) Then that would make your claim easier. In fact, maybe - since that's a second property of his, you could claim against it.
It will work in your favour probably. He's acting like an idiot!
Don't waste too much money. Maybe have him followed home from work, once or twice, Maybe, clock if his car's outside, (yourself or friend) keep diary. You don't need a private Dic to sit outside 24hrs.
You have a legal claim on your home. He can't intimidate you out of that. Sit tight! Once you start mediation, or settle through legal channels, you'll have a clearer picture of what he's got, what you can claim.
If you don't know what you can claim. Go for a free consultation with a solicitor, (or use cheap on-line advice, usually £40 an hour). That way you're better informed than just what your ex is telling you!
Yes... I have thought of all the scenarios.... and I am willing to put in the time and effort to 'gather evidence' if necessary...
I cannot help thinking that he may infact still be paying rent on a flat to 'make it look like he's not living with her'.... she infact owns a guest house, so I doubt whether they would be buying a property together.
It just seems to me that somewhere down the line when it comes to sorting out our finances and sale of the house etc that he can basically lie through his teeth, and unless I can prove otherwise, he will come out 'better off'....
Again, many thanks for your very sound advice
The fact that he's not 'needing' to live in the MH, means his housing needs are already met. Doesn't really matter if he's in her guest house, or renting a flat. if he is renting, then in mediation, on financial disclosure, that'll be declared under his outgoings. (Along with the bills).
He can lie, but they tend to look at 'proof'. They can run - but they can't hide honey!
and congratulations (not sure if that's the right word) on becoming platinum!!!
So.... can you tell me... when we have to do this disclosure thing will he have to provide bank statements, proof of paying rent, (or not as the case may be), paynotes, etc????... and if I 'know' that he isn't telling the truth what can I do?
When you complete the form E He has to provide bank statements mortgage statements endownment policy statements p60 and three pay slips. When you are in the court system You have a right to ask questions on all of these finances and he has to disclose them. If he lies it is purgery hope this helps