can you help a newbie out?

Hi there

I needs some help!

My husband walked out on me 2 weeks ago - he left me for soemone else and said he wasnt happy with me (11 months after our wedding)

We dont own a house we private rent, i have handed in my notice on the house as i can not afford to live here alone.

now my problem is were in a lot of debt - mainly in my name as he doesnt have a bank account (to lazy to open one!)

I cant pay all the bills on my own, its a couple of hundered pound more than my wage and i would still need food and petrol.

Does he have to pay half?

ding dang,

we're sorry to hear what your going through, divorce is rarely easy.

If they are debts accrued during the marriage then i simple terms - yes they are joint debts.

Debts you had before marriage in such a short marriage are in general your own responsibility.

So when you negotiate (via mediators, directly or through the courts) to settle the financial side of the divorce, the debts will be regarded as joint debts.

However, the creditors (credit card/loan companies) will for the time being hold you alone responsible and will chase you for them if they are in your name.

It sounds like you dont have many assets - but assets accrued during the marriage are also joint ( cars, furniture, pensions, savings, etc).

You should write a list of what debts were incurred during the marriage and what assets were accrued. Normally you then share out the assets minus the debts - though in your case it sounds like it is mostly debts.

Dear Ding Dang,

As a former debt counsellor, I understand your predicament all too well. Let me assure you that you are not alone. There is help out there and it need not cost you anything to get it.

As a start, may I suggest that you refer to the CAB website called adviceguide and then click on ' Debt '. This will give you a lot of useful advice as to where to start. Please, whatever you do, do not panic. You must always be allowed to keep enough of your income to live on.

May I suggest you make an appointment with a CAB for a benefit check as quickly as you can get it. While you are at it, ask for a booklet called DEALING WITH YOUR DEBTS, which again gives you some useful advice.

The problem is that different levels of debt call for different strategies and it would be inappropriate to discuss your personal details on a forum like this. The issue of divorce is a complicating factor but without knowing your husband#s circumstances I can't advise.

I hope this advice will be of some help and will go some way towards easing your worries.

Mike