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a different twist on ancilliary releief

  • waterboy
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17 Oct 07 #4816 by waterboy
Topic started by waterboy
I have a probing question!
I am about to enter ancilliary relief,
I am terminally ill and suffer with a progressive neurological genetic disease similar to motor neurones.
My delightful ex kicked me out and made me homeless and un cared for.
I now have temp accomadation and a care report compiled by my local health authority stating I need 24hour care.
At present I have a great carer who is payed 4 hours by the local authority,she tends to be here all day though!!

My questioned is how would the court see this when it comes to pro portioning financial matters.

My ex has children,and no disabilities apart from not being inhumane.


Final note, yes i do feel a bit daunted, I would like some help,I am struggling with an ilness,divorce and the fact that she has denied all contact with my children.............its not easy to deal with that much crapola in one dose.



  • LittleMrMike
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17 Oct 07 #4830 by LittleMrMike
Reply from LittleMrMike
Oh heck.

I just don't know what to say and can't offer much more than my sincere sympathy. At least your carer shows that not everybody is as inhumane as your wife.

First of all, get a throrough benefits check, and particularly disability living allowance, if you haven't done that. A CAB should be able to help.

As regards your disabilities, all I can say, is that disability is one of the factors a Court is statutorily required to take into account. In your case there is little in the way of precedent, but the disability affects the issue in a number of ways. First your earning capacity will be much reduced and maybe even eliminated. Second, your needs will have to take account of your condition, not only as it is now, but how it may develop in the future.

I can't comment on the finances without knowing them. However I would regard an award of spousal maintenance against you as very, very unlikely. It might even lead to an award in your favour ; but this depends on whether your wife could afford it. Even if she can't, I would advise a nominal order be sought ; this means she pays nothing but you could apply for a variation upwards if her circumstances change for the better.

The issue of care and nursing home fees is very specialised and beyond the competence of anyone on this website to advise you. There is a small number of solicitors who have cornered this limited market and are experts. A specialist organisation might be able to put you in touch with one of them. Local authorities tend to try and avoid this sort of liability but often they bend the rules and rely on people's ignorance of their rights.

Sorry, I don't think I can help more than this, but your situation puts ours very much into perspective.

Good luck

Mike 100468

  • Sera
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17 Oct 07 #4836 by Sera
Reply from Sera
Hi Simon,
Agree with Mike, you have circumstances that would need specilaist advice. But feel free to stick around with us for your emotional needs....

We're all a bit up that creek, without that paddle.

Sorry that your situation is so sad, although as Mike said, your Carer proves there are still good people out there!
There have been a few other posters' from people either with disabilities, or caring full-time for children with illness, whereby they can't work. I don't recall names to hand; but hope one of them may post their findings
re: inability to work.

Good luck, stick around,

  • lindy lou
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17 Oct 07 #4847 by lindy lou
Reply from lindy lou
This message struck a chord- I thought I was the only one! I have 2 severely disabled young adults (26 and 25) They both have serious problems and sadly will never be any better. The oldest has just contacted c diff and needed 95% of her bowel removed. (but thats another story) My s2b ex (45 grand a year in the fire service)stopped paying the mortgage 16 months ago when he left to live with another man.The house that has been fully adapted in now under a repossession order and he wants us out.I am currently fighting him and the mortgage company- nobody can tell me what will happen...:(

  • topaz
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17 Oct 07 #4859 by topaz
Reply from topaz

  • lindy lou
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18 Oct 07 #4865 by lindy lou
Reply from lindy lou
Thank you xx

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