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Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage

  • confusedchap
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9 months 3 days ago #509191 by confusedchap
Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage was created by confusedchap
Hi,

I found out recently that since April, my Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage. This is obviously a little alarming and I have started receiving calls asking me to pay the arrears.

I have a financial order that states I transfer the property to her and she is responsible for paying the mortgage (in simple terms).

We don't speak but when I queried it with her she says she doesn't have enough money to pay the mortgage.

Would anyone have any advice as to what I can do here.. I live in a different property and pay the rent/bills and child maintenance , so have no funds left over to make mortgage payments on a house that no longer belongs to me.

She has stayed there for 4 years since the split with our 3 kids. Only in the last 3/4 months has she stopped paying the mortgage.

help! :blink:

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  • Grrrrrrrrrr01
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9 months 3 days ago #509193 by Grrrrrrrrrr01
Replied by Grrrrrrrrrr01 on topic Re:Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage
Hi Confusedchap,

I had something similar, admittedly no children involved thank goodness.

Quick question, does she have to use her best endeavours to release you from the mortgage ?

I've literally been going through this for the last few years.

From my experience, write to your mortgage lender, explain everything IN writing, enclose a copy of the court order ruling that she is fully liable for the payments.

I know it's money you won't have, but seek legal advice, ask a solicitor to write to her demanding proof of her \"best endeavours\" to remove you from the mortgage, I.e, has she been to a different lender regarding remortgage, taking on the mortgage on on her own etc.

Push for as much evidence as possible, if she hasn't done any of this, you can then consider other options. I literally going through this right now.

I actually refused to sign anything over to her, even though the courts ruled I had 56 days to do so, that was 3 years ago & I still haven't done it, purely for the reason, I wanted her to prove that she had tried to release me from any financial obligations, which she had no intention of doing. Purely because their was no way on this earth a lender would have given her financial backing A) she didn't earn enough B)she had credit card debt through the roof C)& she knew she wouldn't be able to afford the house without me on the mortgage. In other words, there was absolutely no incentive for her to try anything else. Why would she,??.

So it's now finally come to a head, she has run up 3K in arrears & has no option but to sell the house, Realistically, the court should never have ruled the decision that was made, which is sounding pretty similar to your ruling.

My fmh now has a repo' order about to be slapped on it too, so she has to have it all tied up by next Wednesday.

Get that letter written asap with the copy of the court ruling to your lender, ok, it's not the perfect answer, but it will prove to the lender that you are trying your best to be honest with them, ask them for copies of the arrears i.e statements etc & get them to a solicitor asap.

I'm sorry I can't offer much more advise at the moment, but at least keeping in contact with the lender, you know exactly what the arrears are at all times, I know it's frustrating them bothering you, but it's nice to be kept up to date with it, because if your ex is like mine, she kept everything so well hidden from me.

It was only recently I found out she had borrowed more on the mortgage without my knowledge & she had forged my signature to get the money, so depending on the outcome next week, my solicitor has also recommended I contact the Police regarding her fraudulent transaction.

I'm at the point I just want it all over, but push her for evidence releasing you
from the mortgage,

Best wishes my friend, hope that helps a little,

Grrrrrrrrrr01

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9 months 3 days ago #509194 by confusedchap
Replied by confusedchap on topic Re:Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage
Thank you for the detailed reply, your situation sounds exactly like mine.

Yes there is a line in the order regarding 'best endeavours'

The next time they ring (it's almost daily currently!) I'll ask for an email address/postal address and send in the financial order that proves she is responsible for paying the mortgage payments. I think the problem is that as the mortgage is in joint names, we are both equally liable in their eyes.

I have asked them to send me a statement and hopefully this should come through soon. They had the fmh as my address still somehow so all the letters were going to the ex.

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9 months 3 days ago #509195 by Grrrrrrrrrr01
Replied by Grrrrrrrrrr01 on topic Re:Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage
Hi again,

That's exactly what was happening to me, Up date your address asap so that any correspondence comes directly to you, so that way you know just what really is going on.

I had given up any sort of hope until I went to see my current Solicitor who I have to add, has been just incredible.

Without his knowledge & knowing what to try I would be \"going down\" with her next week.

Always be honest with the lender, Get the copy of the court order to them as quickly as you can, yes, you are still on the mortgage but they will see you have no financial gain from the property & will be likely to pressure your ex more than you.

My lender has been great, they have chased the ex for the money but have always called me or wrote to me explaining the content of the call or sent copies of any letters addressed to her.

Make it as easy for yourself as you possibly can. Maybe ask your Solicitor to threaten her with court action again due to her defaulting on the mortgage & that you intend to force a sale.

Yes of course you wants what is best for your children, but you also have to do right in a financial manner for them to.

I know people who regardless of the children, have taken control due to court rulings, that the have sold their houses & the partner & children have been rehomed by local authority I.e Council, Housing Association, because the lender wants there money, the court's can only do so much & rule so much, they won't pay your mortgage or arrears for you, so keep in mind, they is a light at the end of the tunnel, yes, this will take some time to resolve, one last piece of advice, don't own anything, have no assets, I have my car on finance, anything I need to buy, I pay on my partners bank card & give her the cash.

Protect your own finances, my Ex just annihilated my credit rating, I don't think the banks would have lent me a £5, let alone anything else. I've managed to build it back up, but so far it's taken nearly 5 years, I have to thank my new partner for that for her patience & perserverance to get me back on my feet.

Buy a diary, log everything, phone calls from lenders, dates, times etc. if you can, photo copy all correspondence so you can give your solicitor the extra copies so you won't be charged for that, it's all the little things like that that can help to keep the cost down.

Make a point this evening of doing the letter to the lender with the court order ruling copies & send them recorded delivery. Get the ball rolling before the arrears get any worse.

I was always told, to use her \"best endeavours\" it is what it is, it used to infuriate me, the fact I was homeless sleeping rough, to me that just wasn't acceptable, that there had to be a way I could turn this around & sort it out, too many people have lost out because of this dreadful ruling, It's not like we even had children, she worked part time, earned about £6k per annum & the court saw it fit to award her the property with a £70k mortgage, & in her late 50's it was pretty obvious to me what was going to happen. An old cottage, that the court was made aware of needed a new roof, re-wire & dreadful rising damp, say no more, but they saw fit in their decision to hand it to her on a plate.

It's only due to my solicitor demanding the proof of her \"best endeavours\" that we are where we are today.

Try not to disclose to much to your ex, let her dig her own hole,....Harsh.....but fair. ;)


Best wishes


Grrrrrrrrrr01

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9 months 3 days ago #509203 by WYSPECIAL
Replied by WYSPECIAL on topic Re:Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage
confusedchap wrote:

Thank you for the detailed reply, your situation sounds exactly like mine.

Yes there is a line in the order regarding 'best endeavours'

The next time they ring (it's almost daily currently!) I'll ask for an email address/postal address and send in the financial order that proves she is responsible for paying the mortgage payments. I think the problem is that as the mortgage is in joint names, we are both equally liable in their eyes.

I have asked them to send me a statement and hopefully this should come through soon. They had the fmh as my address still somehow so all the letters were going to the ex.


Does it mention that she must indemnify you against any losses? If it does you can go back to court to recover the money, by forcing sale of the house if necessary, if you have to pay any money to the lender.

Unfortunately you signed up to an agreement with the lender and only the lender can release you from this not the court.

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9 months 2 days ago #509212 by confusedchap
Replied by confusedchap on topic Re:Ex has stopped paying our joint mortgage
Hi,

Thanks. It may do.. the wording is more than confusing :unsure:

Yes I am happy that from the lenders point of view it is a joint account and I did indeed sign up to it.

I will be sending them the fax shortly detailing the financial order and then hopefully the ex will agree a payment plan she can afford with them.

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