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Ex trying to make out I have lied on Form E...:-(

  • cavegirl
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02 Jan 08 #9847 by cavegirl
Topic started by cavegirl
Hi all,

Haven't been on for a while and really struggling with events at the moment. My 2b ex has sent back a questionnaire in response to my form E. (We are trying to sort out the finances.)Just to give some background: He is in the FMH, while I am struggling in rented accomodation. We were married for 8 yrs before I left, deeply unhappy in the marriage, though we cohabited for 6 years before the marriage. He paid for the mortgage, most bills, furniture, while I paid for all groceries/things for FMH, furnishings, half holidays, cooked every night etc..both of us worked fulltime. It was an agreement that he enjoyed but he always felt the FMH was his as he brought it to the marriage. Wouldn't let me near the mortgage.

He is now suggesting that I have over 150K stashed away in an account somewhere(?????), blatantly lying that I contributed 3/4's less than what I did in reality; wants documentary proof of the financial contributions that I specified in form E,implying that I didn't contribute financially at all when I did; he even questions why I haven't saved money while he has, as if to suggest that I squander money and am sponging after his! His solicitor has asked for an explanation of why I have no savings!:ohmy:Is this right?

His mortgage is low, under £200 pcm, while I have to pay nearly 4 times that in rented accomodation. I have had to move several times since we separated and had to take a bankloan out to try to pay for things. It has been a nightmare and yet I have not asked him for a penny, hoping to resolve everything between the nisi and absolute. There are no kids involved but there is at least 250K equity. He however, doesn't believe I deserve more than 5% of this. I don't want everything he has and would settle for less than 50/50 just to move on from this. But, 5% is just an insult.

Now, it feels as though he is again trying to bully me, which he has always tried to do.Do I really have to prove that I paid for plants in 1992, for example, by producing the receipts? If so, then I will never be able to prove that I have contributed. Can he ask me to produce evidence at this stage? It hasn't even gone to court! I have bank and credit card statements that show my contributions but I don't have 15 years of paperwork or receipts!

It just feels as if he is trying to wear me down, so that I will let him have everything. I just want a chance to get up onto my feet again as I am on my knees financially now. 15 years of my adult life were spent with him- I invested my wages in our lifestyle, our home, him and yet he is trying to paint me as a sponger. He is questioning my integrity and honesty..Just don't know what to do from here or how to prove myself. :unsure:Any ideas? I would really appreciate any advice.

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03 Jan 08 #9855 by attilladahun
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He's a plonk=The expenditure in form E is aimed at future expenditure -so one can ascertain "needs" -not what you are spending at present!!!!

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03 Jan 08 #9856 by attilladahun
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His solicitor has asked for an explanation of why I have no savings! Is this right?

Irrelevant-question =refuse to answer it the DJ will unlikely allow it- If you have answered the Q re capital correctly that sort of nonsense is only left for a final hearing -but it will be most unusual if it gets that far!

In the eyes of the Crt this is a 14 year marriage in effect-

Importantly what is his and your incomes -this is a needs case and the cost of what a reasonable MH and how you raise the £ to get it is crucial

He is never going to get away with anything like 5%

Now he will try to argue contribution-what was the equity in FMH when you started living together?

Now, it feels as though he is again trying to bully me, which he has always tried to do.Do I really have to prove that I paid for plants in 1992, for example, by producing the receipts? If so, then I will never be able to prove that I have contributed. Can he ask me to produce evidence at this stage? -No its crock- reply to Q that the question is irrelevant -

so that I will let him have everything- WHY

You are going to get a meaningful capital settlement so don't panic please!!

All you have to do is argue the case from need.....

Anyway the profit in the property earned since you started living with him in in the bank already....

AND if you have a SM claim extra capital on top....

AND lets half the pensions that have grown during the marriage....

AND if you still haven't got enough capital on top of your mortgagability to buy a house then that is the extra you are fighting for!!!

Research what is REASONABLE housing in your area...

H shouldn't really buy a more expensive ppty -if so why....

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03 Jan 08 #9858 by attilladahun
Reply from attilladahun
His solicitor has asked for an explanation of why I have no savings! Is this right?

Irrelevant-question =refuse to answer it the DJ will unlikely allow it- If you have answered the Q re capital correctly that sort of nonsense is only left for a final hearing -but it will be most unusual if it gets that far!

In the eyes of the Crt this is a 14 year marriage in effect-

Importantly what is his and your incomes -this is a needs case and the cost of what a reasonable MH and how you raise the £ to get it is crucial

He is never going to get away with anything like 5%

Now he will try to argue contribution-what was the equity in FMH when you started living together?

Now, it feels as though he is again trying to bully me, which he has always tried to do.Do I really have to prove that I paid for plants in 1992, for example, by producing the receipts? If so, then I will never be able to prove that I have contributed. Can he ask me to produce evidence at this stage? -No its crock- reply to Q that the question is irrelevant -

so that I will let him have everything- WHY

You are going to get a meaningful capital settlement so don't panic please!!

All you have to do is argue the case from need.....

Anyway the profit in the property earned since you started living with him in in the bank already....

AND if you have a SM claim extra capital on top....

AND lets half the pensions that have grown during the marriage....

AND if you still haven't got enough capital on top of your mortgagability to buy a house then that is the extra you are fighting for!!!

Research what is REASONABLE housing in your area...

H shouldn't really buy a more expensive ppty -if so why....

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03 Jan 08 #9859 by attilladahun
Reply from attilladahun
His solicitor has asked for an explanation of why I have no savings! Is this right?

Irrelevant-question =refuse to answer it the DJ will unlikely allow it- If you have answered the Q re capital correctly that sort of nonsense is only left for a final hearing -but it will be most unusual if it gets that far!

In the eyes of the Crt this is a 14 year marriage in effect-

Importantly what is his and your incomes -this is a needs case and the cost of what a reasonable MH and how you raise the £ to get it is crucial

He is never going to get away with anything like 5%

Now he will try to argue contribution-what was the equity in FMH when you started living together?

Now, it feels as though he is again trying to bully me, which he has always tried to do.Do I really have to prove that I paid for plants in 1992, for example, by producing the receipts? If so, then I will never be able to prove that I have contributed. Can he ask me to produce evidence at this stage? -No its crock- reply to Q that the question is irrelevant -

so that I will let him have everything- WHY

You are going to get a meaningful capital settlement so don't panic please!!

All you have to do is argue the case from need.....

Anyway the profit in the property earned since you started living with him in in the bank already....

AND if you have a SM claim extra capital on top....

AND lets half the pensions that have grown during the marriage....

AND if you still haven't got enough capital on top of your mortgagability to buy a house then that is the extra you are fighting for!!!

Research what is REASONABLE housing in your area...

H shouldn't really buy a more expensive ppty -if so why....

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03 Jan 08 #9860 by attilladahun
Reply from attilladahun
He's a plonk=The expenditure in form E is aimed at future expenditure -so one can ascertain "needs" -not what you are spending at present!!!!

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03 Jan 08 #9866 by cavegirl
Reply from cavegirl
Hi

Hey, thanks for your replies! I appreciate it. Our salaries are fairly similar, though my outgoings exceed my incomings, due to my situation. HIs financial situation is rosy, of course.

He is even questioning that I stated one future need I have is for therapy. He wants to know why/how long for etc. Again, do I have to give details?

He has stated a figure of his needs as twice as mine, yet he is in the FMH.I am still trying to work this one out! I kept my estimation of future needs at a reasonable sum,mainly a need for a deposit for a one bedroom house- nothing extravagant. But at the end of the day, he refuses to acknowledge that I contributed enough money. Isn't a marriage more than that? I just can't get over the fact that he acknowledged some of my financial contribution in an email two years ago and now seems to be back-tracking, making out he paid for everything and I made a paltry contribution. How can I prove my honesty if he is hell-bent on discrediting me?

Why is his solicitor allowing him to put these questions to me? If they are irrelevant, won't his sol know that? Am just so confused by it all.:S

Cavegirl x

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